


Champions

by CodeMythic11000



Series: Welcome to Etheria [3]
Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Catra Goes to Therapy (She-Ra), Catra is trying but she's still more than a bit self destructive, Etheria - Freeform, Etheria has a mind of its own, F/F, Fluff, I may or may not be making She-Ra more OP than she already is, I'm taking She-Ra and going wild with it, Light Angst, she gets better though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:22:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27330421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CodeMythic11000/pseuds/CodeMythic11000
Summary: After the war, things seem to change, mostly for the better. The war and her childhood left Catra with a list of trauma a mile long, but she's trying. She doesn't always succeed and somedays feel like she's taking steps backward rather than forward, but she's getting there.Adora is still trying to figure She-Ra out, but it's hard when things keep changing and new factors keep getting added in.  Catra seems to be insistent that Adora should hang up the sword for good, but Adora is starting to figure out that She-Ra is more than just a weapon and tool to recover from war and she doesn't want to hang up the sword just yet until she figures out what it was really meant for.(This fic bounces back and forth between Catra and Adora although the first 3 chapters are all Adora)
Relationships: Adora & Bow & Glimmer (She-Ra), Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora & Glimmer (She-Ra), Adora & Mara (She-Ra), Adora & Razz (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Catra & Entrapta & Scorpia (She-Ra), Catra & Entrapta (She-Ra), Catra & Scorpia (She-Ra)
Series: Welcome to Etheria [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1991998
Comments: 22
Kudos: 81





	1. Scars

Adora sleeps for days after she defeats Prime and they make it back to Brightmoon. As soon as they are within the castle walls, she grabs Catra’s shoulder, says a few words to Glimmer and Bow (she doesn’t quite remember what she said to them but from the amused look on their faces, it was probably something dumb), and then makes a beeline for her room, dragging Catra along with her.

Catra doesn’t seem to mind; she mostly just looks amused.

Melog follows until the room but ultimately decides that Catra is safe and goes to explore the castle. Being a creature composed almost entirely of magic must be nice. They’re still riding a high after Adora restored magic to Etheria and are not ready to rest yet. The wave of energy released also restored Melog’s own and the alien cat has no need for sleep at the moment.

Adora is almost envious.

Most rooms have been raided but Adora’s was mostly left alone. Her bed’s still there, at least, which is pretty much all she cares about at moment.

She doesn’t even bother changing. She just flops down onto her bed, ignoring the way dust flies into the air when she does.

Catra’s soft chuckles sound from behind her.

“You’re not even changed yet, dummy.”

Adora merely groans loudly and Catra’s chuckles get louder.

“Here.” Adora whines pitifully as Catra rolls her over and slides her arms underneath. With a soft grunt, Catra lifts her off the bed.

“You’re built like a goddamn tank, Adora. Moons above, you’re heavy,” Catra comments and Adora merely pouts at her as she’s carried into the nearby chair and forced to sit in it. “Go get changed first. I’ll try to find a pair of sheets that aren’t quite so dirty so you aren’t breathing in dust all night.”

Adora’s face makes a weird motion that Catra can’t quite place and she mumbles something that Catra even with her ears, isn’t really able to pick out.

“I didn’t catch that,” Catra says. Adora shrugs.

“It’s nothing.”

“Doesn’t _seem_ like it's nothing,” Catra scolds and Adora sighs. “What is it?”

“I was kinda hoping,” Adora pauses and Catra raises her eyebrow to look at her. Adora sighs again but looks at Catra sort of hopefully. “Kinda wanted you to stay. You know, with me. For the night. If that was okay with you?”

Catra sort of wants to laugh and purr at the same time; it’s a weird feeling. She settles on the former and allows a small smile to form on her face.

“Of course I can stay with you, dummy. You got any clothes I can borrow though?”

“I should.” Adora forces herself to her feet, trying to ignore the way that little bit of rest made her body ache with exhaustion, and goes over to her dresser to pick out two pairs of nightclothes. In the meantime, Catra almost gleefully rips the blankets and covers off the bed, throwing the pillows to the side. Adora lets out a small laugh at the display of Catra’s continued fondness for destruction.

Adora slides into the bathroom to change just as Catra starts to go through the various closets and cupboards in search of a second set of bedding.

“I don’t know that you’ll find any,” Adora warns her just before she closes the door.

“Oh, I’ll find some. Might have to bother Sparkles though. Though I’m not sure how much she’ll appreciate me dropping in on her. She’s probably with Bow being all sappy.”

“Like we’re any better?” Adora asks. Catra lets out a barking laugh.

“Oh please, like either of us are sappier than Bow.”

Adora laughs, turns to look at herself in the mirror, and freezes, blood turning to ice at her reflection. Her hand reaches up to touch her face.

There are faint scarred lines on her face. Four of them, stretching from the hairline on her forehead, through her eyes, down the sides of her face, and then down her neck. She traces them stunned and then rips off her jacket and shirt in desperation.

Sure enough, the Eternian word for “heart” is engraved into her chest. It's clearer and more distinct than the faint lines that she now sees practically covering her whole body.

She swallows and stares at it through the mirror for several long moments.

Catra knocks on the door.

“Adora? Are you alright? You’ve been kind of quiet. I found some bedding and already put it on, so you don’t have to worry about that.”

Adora blinks. Had it already been that long? She shakes her head.

“Y-yeah. I’m fine. I just . . .” She pauses, unsure.

“Adora?”

“. . . I didn’t realize it would scar.”

Catra is silent on the other side of the door for several long moments.

“Can I come in?” Catra asks gently. Adora jerks at the unexpected noise and then scolds herself mentally. Why is she so unsettled by the scar?

“I’m not wearing a shirt,” Adora warns. Catra takes that as an invitation and steps in.

“Oh please, like we haven’t both seen each other stark naked. You still have a bra on, that’s practically fully clothed.”

Despite still being pretty shaken, Adora still manages to roll her eyes at Catra’s comment.

“Are you okay?” Catra asked, watching her curiously. Adora sighs.

“Yeah, I just. I didn’t know it scarred.”

“Nobody told you?” Catra asks and Adora shakes her head.

“No . . . nobody told me and I . . . I guess I didn’t have the chance to see my reflection after I got the failsafe. It was immediately just get to the Heart as soon as possible.”

“. . . You seem shaken. How are you feeling?”

“Honestly? Mostly just tired. I don’t know why I’m so stunned by the fact that the failsafe scarred.”

Catra gives her a concerned look but ultimately tries to raise the mood. They’re both exhausted. Neither one of them have the mental capacity at the moment to handle another breakdown. Catra will simply have to bring it up at a later time. “Adora, I hate to break it to you, but the unfortunate thing is, you tried your best, but you’re still drop-dead gorgeous.”

Adora tries to ignore the way heat rises to her face and punches Catra’s shoulder. Said cat hybrid laughs at her expense.

“In all seriousness, let's get changed and go to bed. You’re exhausted, Adora, but the war is done and you can _rest_. Let’s worry about the scars in the morning, when you have more mental capacity to do so,” Catra suggests.

Adora takes in a deep breath and nods before pulling on the shirt she selected earlier to sleep in.

“Right.”

Catra smiles at her gently and shoves her with her shoulder before leaving the bathroom. By the time Adora is changed, Catra’s already laying on the bed, dressed in the nightclothes Adora let her borrow, hands folded on her chest and staring up at the ceiling with a small frown.

Her ears twitch as Adora comes closer, and she turns her head to watch as the blonde clambers under the covers and relaxes into the bed with a sigh. After a moment’s thought, Catra follows her lead and slides under the covers before turning to look at Adora.

The blonde truly does look absolutely exhausted. There are bags under her eyes that only seem to have been accentuated now that she’s actually in bed. But there’s a hint of tension in Adora’s shoulders, one that keeps the blonde’s eyes open and Catra wonders for a moment if she should have just let Adora sleep in her dirty clothes and dirty bed to avoid the blonde’s worrying over the scars.

“Hey,” Catra starts quietly. Adora turns her head to look at her. “They’ll fade.”

“I know. . . I don’t exactly know how to feel about them. . . The scars from you,” Adora starts and Catra’s ears press tightly to the side of her face in shame and Adora stumbles for a moment. “Catra, I’m sorry. I’m not ashamed or hurt by them. They don’t hurt and I don’t get upset at the sight of them. They are _worth it_ to be with you again. I never thought any less of you for them.”

Catra takes a quick breath to calm herself. “Adora, what scarred?” she asks seriously. Adora studies her for a long moment before sighing.

“It might be too dark but there’s a couple on my cheek that are mostly faded now and . . .” she pauses.

“And?” Catra urges. Adora doesn’t seem to want to answer and stays silent. “Adora, _and?_ ”

Adora hesitates but opens her mouth to speak. “ . . .the ones on my back.”

Catra’s ears press tighter to her head. “Shit . . . you were She-Ra . . . I didn’t think . . . I didn’t think they’d _scar._ ”

Adora chuckles darkly. “What a pair we make.”

Catra joins her for a moment before quieting. “I’m sorry.”

“I know. But Catra, I was never mad at you for them.”

“So you said. . . but I still . . .”

“It doesn’t matter, Catra. The scars don’t matter. They’re just _scars_ and they will always be _just_ scars.”

“. . . so why do the marks from the failsafe bother you so much?”

Adora hesitates in order to gather her thoughts. “I think it's because I actually have a negative memory to associate with them. You were never negative. I mean, I hated fighting you. I hated what you were doing but . . . I knew you, I knew what you could be and I always held out hope . . . I don’t regret what I did, how could I? We saved the universe. . . but it was terrifying and . . . I still can’t believe it's over. Some part of me I guess thinks that the failsafe is still in me and I need to deliver it still, like all of _this_ is an illusion.”

Catra reaches out to grab Adora’s hand. “It’s not an illusion.”

“I know. I know it isn’t.”

The two stay quiet for a long time.

“We both need sleep. Maybe it’ll be better in the morning?” Catra suggests and Adora nods, finally forcing the last bit of tension out of her body and closing her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of an odd ending but I needed to cut it off there.
> 
> Also, I suddenly remembered that this chapter is unintentionally eerily similar to somebody else's work. If I find said work again ( I do not remember the name), I will mention it here. Because I don't quite remember reading that work before I wrote this chapter but I might have, so if I subconsciously pulled some wording/ideas from it, I NEED to mention that.


	2. Recovery Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are side effects, apparently, to channeling a thousand years worth of magic through your body.

Neither one wakes up until the sun is well in the sky the next morning. But when they finally do, Catra is the only one with the strength to actually get up. Channeling over a thousand years of pent-up magic did a number on Adora’s body and even though no permanent damage had been done (they had a doctor come and check after Adora couldn’t move to get up that morning), Adora still feels heavy and weak. There is a little bit of soreness, but it feels more like the soreness you get the morning after a good workout.

Mostly, her body just feels like lead. Like she physically doesn’t have the strength to lift herself up. So Catra brings her food and water and keeps her company so she doesn’t go crazy from boredom. Bow and Glimmer stop by later in the day, bringing more food and staying for several hours. Adora tries to stay awake to play a game with them on the floor but eventually falls asleep.

Glimmer watches, worried, as Catra gently pulls the cards from Adora’s hands, picks the sleeping blonde up with a grunt, and places her back in the bed.

“The doctor really said she was fine?” Glimmer asks quietly. “I’ve never seen her like this.”

Catra nods as she sits back down and picks up her cards. “She said it was probably just a side effect of channeling so much magic. She thinks it should go away eventually.”

“But she was fine after she defeated Prime. She didn’t show any signs of this until this morning,” Glimmer comments, and Catra shakes her head.

“I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but when I made her sit down in a chair while I changed out the bedsheets so we weren’t sleeping on dust, she seemed a little stiff. It only seemed to be like that after she rested for a bit. I just don’t think she’s had the chance to rest before all of this.”

“That sort of makes sense, sometimes your muscles only stiffen up after you rest for a bit. But this bad?” Bow asks. Catra shrugs.

“I don’t know, but I hope it goes away soon. I’m not sure how much longer I can keep her entertained enough to not get completely stir crazy.”

“What, she wasn’t stir crazy already? Adora usually can’t lay down for more than a few moments, let alone all day,” Glimmer asks. Catra smirks.

“Guess I just got better skills than you do, Sparkles,” Catra teases and Glimmer glares at her.

Bow looks at Adora worriedly. “It just seems strange. Why didn’t she feel any signs of this yesterday? I mean, she might of but just not told us, but still . . . it doesn’t seem right. And for her to mostly just feel _heavy?_ You’d think that after channeling that much magic she’d be in pain if anything but she’s hardly in any pain at all. Instead, she just looks _exhausted_.”

Catra sighs. “I don’t know what to tell you, Arrow Boy. Melog told me that they think Adora was far more damaged by the Heart than we thought but She-Ra’s magic has been protecting her from most of it. That’s why she’s only in a little bit of pain rather than a whole bunch. But she still needs to _heal_ so She-Ra’s magic makes her feel heavy and tired so that she lays down and rests.”

“That sort of makes sense, but how do they _know_ that?” Glimmer asks. Catra shrugs.

“I didn’t really ask. I think they’re able to sense magic to some degree. I mean, they are pretty attuned to it.”

Glimmer nods, mostly satisfied with that answer. Bow looks around confused.

“Where is Melog, anyway?”

Catra rubs the back of her head. “I uh, kinda chased them off with worried questions this morning. I was pretty freaked out after Adora wasn’t able to get up. They didn’t seem too concerned about it but I probably asked a question too many and they went to explore the castle some more.”

Both Bow and Glimmer nod in understanding.

“So she should be okay?” Glimmer asks.

“I hope so.”

“And are _you_ okay?” Glimmer asks. Catra looks at her in alarm.

“Uh, why are you asking?”

“Because _clearly_ you're worried about Adora and I know we’ve kind of already talked about that but I just wanted to make sure you were alright.” Catra stares at her for a moment a bit stunned before responding.

“I . . . I think I’m okay. For now at least. There’s a lot I have to work through before I’ll _really_ be okay but . . . right now I just want Adora to get better. There . . . we had a bit of a conversation last night. I’m still a bit shaken up about it,” Catra responds truthfully, but hesitantly, tensing slightly. She trusts Glimmer, trusts Bow, but she has a list of trauma a mile long that’s she’s not ready to talk about and she’s afraid of losing herself if she opens up too many old wounds.

Glimmer stares at Catra a bit confused and worried but clearly the cat hybrid doesn’t really want to elaborate so she merely nodes in acceptance.

“Okay, did you need anything?” Glimmer asks and Catra relaxes a bit, shaking her head.

“No, I’ll be fine. We didn’t fight or anything, we just . . . mucked through some bad memories and it . . . well,” Catra isn’t sure she wants to continue. Bow simply smiles at her and puts a hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t worry about it. We get it. You don’t have to share if you’re not ready,” Bow says. Catra lets the tension leave her body completely.

“Thanks,” she responds, relieved.

“You can always talk to us though if you need anything,” Glimmer reassures and Catra smiles slightly.

For several moments the three of them just stare at their cards, not really playing the game before Catra gives up and throws her cards down, laying back on the floor with a huff.

“Adora didn’t know that the failsafe had scarred her,” Catra informs them and both Bow and Glimmer look at her in surprise.

“She didn’t know?” Bow asks and Catra shakes her head.

“Apparently, she never had a chance to look at her reflection before last night. She was a bit shaken up about it.”

Bow and Glimmer share a worried look.

“I . . . I thought she knew, honestly,” Glimmer comments and Bow frowns.

“How could she? We didn’t have any mirrors at camp and I don’t know that anybody told her. _I_ didn’t tell her at least,” Bow responds.

“Why was she so shaken up about it though? She’s never been worked up over a scar before,” Glimmer asks.

“She said the scar makes her think that she still has to take the failsafe to the Heart yet,” Catra tells them and both Glimmer and Bow look at each other worried again.

“You know, for someone who’s absolutely awful at lying, she’s terrifyingly good at hiding her issues,” Glimmer comments, and all awake members in the room nod in unison.

“Thanks for letting us know, Catra” Bow says and Catra nods stiffly. They sit in silence again for some time before Glimmer sighs loudly.

“I need to start working on recovery efforts,” she groans quietly.

“You can take a longer break, Glimmer,” Bow reassures and Glimmer nods.

“I know, it's just. I can’t really sit around knowing that there are so many people that need help. Adora healed the planet, fixed all the cracks, and restored life but there are hundreds of spires and Horde constructs and robots, and then there’s all the villages that have been destroyed and the people that need to be brought _back_ to their villages because Prime took them away and Salineas needs to be rebuilt,” Catra winces at that one. “And overall, there’s just _so much_ that needs to be done before I can comfortably leave the planet with Adora to restore magic to the universe. I mean, Prime’s gone, but we’re in no condition to be leaving Etheria on its own. And who _knows_ what restoring magic actually did to the planet. We haven’t had this kind of magic in _centuries_ ; we’ve forgotten how to live with it.”

Bow sighs. “You’re right, but you also need to take care of yourself.”

Catra, still unnerved after the mention of Salineas, manages a small smirk on her face. “Yeah, Sparkles, don’t be like Adora.”

They all manage a small laugh at that. Catra debates for a few long moments before sitting up and rubbing the back of her neck. She takes a deep breath.

“I . . . I can help with the recovery effort. I’m good at organizing supplies and troops. I don’t want credit for it or anything. If anybody asks, say Bow did it or something. But I can help.”

“Catra, you’re not obligated to do anything,” Bow responds. Catra shakes her head.

“No, I need to. I won’t be able to live with myself if I don’t help fix the damage I caused.”

“Catra,” Glimmer starts, but she’s cut off.

“Don’t, Glimmer.” Glimmer’s mouth closes with an audible noise. Catra almost _never_ calls her by her real name to her face and she is suddenly struck with how serious the cat hybrid is being.

“Okay, then. I’ll start talking to you about recovery efforts tomorrow,” Glimmer concedes. Internally, she’s kind of grateful that Catra wants to help. She knows how close the Horde came to defeating them and she knows it was all a result of Catra’s strategic prowess. If Catra is just as dedicated to recovery efforts as she was to destruction, she could be a major asset.

But she also knows that Catra is still hurting and as her friend, she cannot in good conscience allow Catra to wear herself ragged trying to repair the damage she’d done. Not like she had trying to destroy the rebellion (Glimmer had heard from Scorpia how absolutely worn down Catra had become running the Horde).

But today is not the day to approach that subject. Not when doing so might cause an argument that wakes Adora up. Not when emotions are still high strung from the effects of the war.

So she concedes and resolves to knock some sense into Catra later if it proves to be a problem.

Catra seems satisfied with that answer and relaxes. Glimmer stands with a nod and stretches.

“Well, if we want to do actual work tomorrow, we should probably get to bed. It’s getting late. Take care of our resident blonde dumbass for us, Horde scum.”

“Always, Glitter.”

“Your relationship is just going to dissolve to casual insults between you two, isn’t it?” Bow states tiredly. Catra smirks.

“Why such a lack of faith in us, Crop top?” she asks, and Bow sighs. Glimmer laughs.

“It’s not like we’re gonna kill each other, Bow.”

Bow makes a dying noise but is unable to fully respond before Glimmer grabs his shoulder and teleports away with a wave. Catra chuckles and forces herself to her feet, looking over at Adora who’s sleeping soundly in bed, drooling slightly.

She smiles gently and starts making preparations to join her. She’s still worried and uneasy about this whole situation, but at least she can start getting rid of the burning guilt in her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit more fluff, a lot more angst. The next chapter is honestly crack worthy. . . you'll see when you read it.


	3. Nobody knows what's going on, stop asking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora is simply cutting vegetables when something strange happens.

It takes a couple of weeks before the heaviness is gone enough for Adora to walk around without needing to rest against a wall every few steps. She still has to take frequent breaks and most of her work is confined to simple tasks that don’t require much physical strength (such as paperwork and cutting vegetables to feed recovery workers or homeless) which sort of drives her mad but honestly she finds it almost relieving because it reminds her that there isn’t some kind of battle coming up.

But as she recovers, she starts to work more, which kind of proves to be an issue.

Catra always fetches her for meals and rest, reminding her constantly to take care of herself. (She forces Adora to take a break almost every hour.) Most of the time, Catra is elsewhere, helping Glimmer with some other task, but if Adora is feeling particularly uneasy or weak, Catra stays by her side and cuts vegetables along with her. (She doesn’t even have to ask. Catra just knows.)

But Catra left for Salineas to start the rebuilding process there this morning and Melog went with her, knowing that Salineas was going to be particularly taxing mentally.

So today, Adora is cutting vegetables by herself, and she’s already forgotten to take four of her hourly breaks. Another worker gave her food around lunchtime, but she hadn’t taken a break since.

She just felt so _useless_ sitting around like this and just cutting vegetables, but clearly, even this was difficult for her because her eyes are drooping and her limbs are sort of starting to feel really heavy again and . . .

Something furry nudges her left hand and she jolts into complete awareness, eyes focusing on an Etherian squirrel that’s looking up at her expectantly.

Adora blinks. The squirrel blinks right back at her and crawls up her arm, staring at her with its three beady eyes. It’s rabbit-like ears twitch and it squeaks.

“Um . . hello? What are you doing here?” Because squirrels were supposed to be in the woods, not in the castle kitchen.

The squirrel just squeaks again and looks up at her. Adora sort of feels like she’s being scolded for something based on the look in its eyes but she has no idea why.

Honestly, this situation was just so _weird._

A few of the other workers in the kitchen give a couple of curious stares and coo softly. Adora resists the urge to blush and gently picks the squirrel up off her arm and puts it on the table.

“Look, I don’t know what you want but I need to get back to work,” Adora tells it and begins to cut again. The squirrel chatters loudly and leaps onto her cutting hand. She jolts, dropping the knife suddenly and grasping for the squirrel but the thing leaps over her hand and races up onto her shoulder.

It chatters _loudly_ into Adora’s ear and she winces. Feeling accomplished, the squirrel races back onto the table and stares at her, tail flicking. Adora glares at it. The squirrel glares right back.

Again, she feels like she’s being scolded for something.

“Are you hungry or something?” She picks up a bit of the carrot she was working on cutting up and offers it to the furry little demon. It doesn’t react to the offering and Adora spends several awkward moments poking a squirrel’s face with a bit of carrot. She sighs and drops the carrot piece into the waste bin next to her. It’s useless now.

She grabs the knife again and the squirrel _screeches_. Adora drops the offensive weapon and leaps to her feet with a shout, knocking her chair to the ground, but clearly, that was a mistake because Adora’s vision tunnels, and all the sudden she’s on the floor with the squirrel half on her chest and half on her face looking at her. She blinks and groans. She must have taken one hell of a fall because her head kind of hurts and her body is really heavy again.

She doesn’t really want to get up all the sudden.

There’s a loud snort from behind her and hot earthy smelling breath breezes her head. Adora adjusts her vision to look more upwards and behind than at the squirrel and comes face to face with a very large snout and several tusks.

“Um,” is all that Adora manages before said snout is forcing her to sit upwards. The head of the boar (and it is a boar now that Adora has managed to process what was happening) bucks at her back and she is thrown upwards with a yell, nearly hitting the ceiling.

She lands on the back of the beast and just sits there stunned, more than a bit dizzy, and very _very_ confused. The boar just snorts proudly and dips its head to let the squirrel climb on. It then proceeds to awkwardly turn around, bumping a few tables in the process (honestly, how did it even get in here?) and head to the doors just as Bow comes racing in, namesake weapon in hand.

“Adora! I got word that . . .” he pauses as he takes in the scene: Adora sitting very confusedly on a massive boar’s back and a squirrel sitting almost smugly on the boar’s head, “there’s a boar heading through the castle and it’s heading your way . . . um . . . Adora? . . . What’s going on?”

“I have no idea.”

“Great . . . what’s with the squirrel?”

“I’ve been wondering that for like the last fifteen minutes. It’s scolding me for something and I don’t know what I _did_.”

“. . . okay and why are you _riding_ the boar?”

“I didn’t come up here _willingly_! It threw me up here!”

“. . . the boar _threw_ you up there?”

“Yes! With its head!”

“. . .”

“Look, I’m very dizzy, Bow, and I kinda just want to lay down, so can you help me get down from this thing?”

“Dizzy? You haven’t had any dizzy spells in a week!”

“. . . I _may_ have taken fewer breaks than what I should have today.”

“ _Adora_.”

“I lost track of time! I’m sorry!”

Bow sighs and steps forward to help Adora off the boar. He doesn’t want to hurt the creature if he doesn’t have to. Boars are one of the things that they didn’t really _see_ before Etheria’s magic was restored. Pretty much all creatures are precious now. They didn’t realize how sparse the wildlife in Etheria was until after the magic had been restored.

The boar grunts at him and bucks his head, missing Bow’s side with its tusks by only a few inches. Bow yelps and scrambles backward.

The boar snorts and trots ahead, ramming the doors open with its snout.

Bow stares confusedly after it for a moment before realizing that a _boar_ was _kidnapping_ Adora and running after it.

The kitchen staff stares very confusedly behind.

* * *

Bow tries a few more times to try and help Adora off (Adora’s exhaustion had spiked and she couldn’t convince her legs to lift high enough so slide herself off of the boars back), but every single time he is met with a face full of tusk that nearly gashes him in the side. So, Bow merely follows behind the boar and shouts at a few guards to get Glimmer because she would be able to fix this really easily with her teleporting powers.

He is very confused when the boar stops at the entrance to Adora’s room and nudges gently at the handle.

“Um . . .” Bow weakly starts.

“Bow, this is my room,” Adora states confusedly.

“I can see that.”

“. . .”

“. . .”

“ _Why did the boar take me to my room?_ ”

“I have no idea.”

The squirrel chatters loudly and both Adora and Bow stare at the thing.

“ . . . Bow, I think you need to open the door,” Adora states.

“ . . . why does it want _in_ your room?”

“You are asking questions I do not know the answer to.”

“. . .”

“. . .”

“ _I guess I’m letting a boar in your room now_.”

“. . . I still don’t know what’s going _on.”_

Bow opens the door and watches amazed as the boar somehow manages to squeeze itself and Adora through the door without bumping Adora’s head on the frame or hurting Adora’s legs.

He stares, cause he’s still having such a hard time processing what’s happening, and then steps inside.

The boar lays down on the floor and then turns its head to look at Bow and grunt at him.

“. . . Adora, what does it want _now_?”

“You think _I_ know?”

The boar grunts again. Bow cautiously approaches and is amazed when the creature actually allows him to stand next to it, close enough to easily grab Adora and pull her off. He moves slowly and gently touches Adora’s leg. (He doesn’t want to get stabbed with six-inch tusks thank you very much). But the boar just continues to stare, so he _gently_ helps Adora slide off the boar and stand on her own two feet. The boar merely grunts again and tilts so it’s laying on its side, tail flicking. The squirrel moves so that it's now standing on the boar’s side.

There’s a series of chimes in the air and suddenly Glimmer’s there.

“GUYS, I’M HERE!” Glimmer shouts out, fists charged with energy. She pauses in confusion at the sight of the boar and the squirrel. “. . . There’s actually a boar and squirrel? I thought the guard was pulling my leg.”

“It sort of kidnapped Adora?” Bow adds helpfully. Glimmer just stares at him confused.

“How do you sort of kidnap someone?”

“Well it picked up Adora and kept nearly hitting me with its tusks so I couldn’t help Adora off but it brought Adora here and let me help her down here so. . .” Bow explains. Glimmer blinks.

“. . . And why couldn’t Adora just get off herself?”

“She didn’t take enough breaks today.”

“ _Adora.”_

“She’s also dizzy.”

“ _Adora.”_

“Wow, way to call me out, Bow,” Adora huffs. Bow merely shrugs and helps her to her bed. Glimmer teleports onto the bed next to her once she’s sitting down on it and all three of them turn to look at the boar that’s laying down.

“. . . So, what are we going to do about the boar that’s decided to take a nap in my room?” Adora asks. Glimmer shrugs.

“I guess I can teleport it out of here,” she answers. The squirrel chatters loudly from its location on the boar’s side.

“ _Yeah, don’t do that_. That kind of noise is usually a warning,” Adora informs them.

“ . . . how did this happen, again? I’m very confused,” Glimmer asks.

“You and me both,” Adora responds unhelpfully.

“We have no idea,” Bow says.

“Why does a _boar_ kidnap you to take you to your own _room_?” Glimmer asks. Both Adora and Bow shrug unhelpfully. “. . . Great.”

There’s a shout from outside and just as the three of them turn to look, they see Catra fall onto the balcony with a grunt.

“ _Catra?!!”_ All three of them shout. The cat hybrid in question, leaps to her feet, opens the balcony door to the room, slams it shut, and then races inside.

“I WAS JUST _KIDNAPPED_ BY A FUCKING FOUR WINGED BIRD!!” Catra shouts. Glimmer, Bow, and Adora stare at her for a moment before Adora snorts.

“Yeah? Well, I was kidnapped by a boar _and_ a squirrel so take that.” Glimmer slaps her forehead.

“ _What the fuck?!”_

“Adora, this is _not_ a competition,” Glimmer groans. The boar snorts loudly and then gets to its feet. All four Etherians watch as the creature leaves the room, squirrel racing after it.

Nobody so much as blinks for several seconds.

“What the absolute _fuck_ ,” Catra mutters. Bow sighs.

“We have no idea,” he states unhelpfully. “But it might have something to do with the fact that Adora didn’t take enough breaks today and it now feeling dizzy.”

“ _That’s the second time you tattled on me, Bow!_ ” Adora shouts. Catra hisses and _pounces_ from where she stands. She lands on Adora and shoves her backward till she’s laying on the bed. She sits on Adora’s chest, her tail lashing agitatedly.

“So you’re telling me, I got _snatched_ by a four-winged bird because Adora is a _dumbass_ ,” Catra hisses.

Bow shrugs. “That’s literally the only thing that makes sense right now,” he states.

“ _Nothing_ , about this makes sense!” Glimmer shouts. Catra nods.

“You two go figure out what the _fuck_ just happened. I’m going to stay here and make sure this dumbass doesn’t so much as twitch a finger for the next _twelve_ hours,” Catra orders, fur standing on end because _she doesn’t understand what the hell is going on and Adora might have been hurt_.

Glimmer, recognizing Catra’s agitation for what it is, nods, grabs Bow’s shoulder, and teleports them away.

Catra looks down at Adora as soon as they are gone.

“Didn’t take enough breaks, huh?” Catra asks. Adora grins up at her sheepishly.

“I honestly forgot, I’m sorry.”

Catra sighs and gets off her chest. She shoves her arms beneath Adora’s body and pushes her into a more comfortable position on the bed.

“Yeah, I know, dummy.”

Adora hates feeling so useless. Hates feeling so unable to do things and help others, but she doesn’t mind it so much when Catra curls into her side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you guys, crack worthy. I have no defense for my actions but it will make sense eventually.  
> I am working on another work that focuses more on Catra's life, rather than Adora's as this one does, that will take place simultaneously alongside this one. The first chapter will likely focus on Catra's point of view from this day so I will focus on writing that one next.


	4. Rebuilding Salineas Begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (This is the single chapter that was in "Out of the Shadow and Into the Light". It occurs simultaneously with chapter 3)

Catra genuinely did _not_ want to head to Salineas. At least, not alone. But she had Melog and hopefully, they would be enough. Quite frankly, she didn’t feel ready, but she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she wasn’t there for the whole rebuilding process. She’d spend as long as she was mentally capable there, and then head back to Brightmoon. Hopefully, she’d be able to last a couple of days.

It had already been two weeks since Adora killed Horde Prime and restored the planet. They spent a day or two resting and then started planning out the rebuilding and recovery process.

Glimmer had been working with Catra for the last two weeks on rebuilding plans. Salineas was the first place they decided to rebuild as the kingdom had been hit the hardest by the war and its people were scattered throughout Etheria. They needed homes to return to. But unfortunately, many Etherian people were mixed and scattered now throughout Etheria, and Glimmer didn’t have enough workers to do much more than send a group towards Salineas to drop off supplies and set up tents. Mermista had left Brightmoon after a couple of days of resting to find her people so they could start rebuilding themselves.

Catra had another idea. And it didn’t take more than a one-day trip to track down her old teammates for it to come to fruition.

Lonnie was less than pleased at the thought of working with Catra but agreed that working with the cat hybrid was probably the best way to get things done. 

Catra would work on scrounging up the supplies, permission, and plans from Glimmer and Lonnie, Rogelio, and Kyle would track down any Horde soldier that wanted to help with the rebuilding process, starting with Salineas. They were a little bit confused at Catra’s insistence that this was a request that came from _Glimmer_ and not _Catra_ but she didn’t explain herself.

They would meet, regardless of how many people or supplies they scrounged up, in Salineas in one week.

Which is today.

Catra spares a worried glance at Adora as she dresses. It’s far earlier than she wants to be up, which sucks, but it's nothing that she’s not used to. Adora is usually up by now though. Or rather, she was when she was in the Horde and she was when they were on Darla or on the last stretch of the war with Prime.

Ever since Adora channeled the energy from the Heart and defeated Prime, however, she’s been feeling tired and _heavy_. Extremely heavy. She couldn’t move very well for several days and even now, after two weeks, Catra’s not exactly fond of leaving the blonde alone. Adora still gets tired quickly and doesn’t seem to be able to do much of anything physically.

Catra really wishes that the doctors in Brightmoon would figure out what the hell is going on with her already.

But she has to do this. She wants to get enough buildings rebuilt and/or fixed so that the first wave of Salineans that Mermista brings has a permanent place to stay. Which means that she needs to get to Salineas and meet up with Lonnie and the others _today_.

She looks back at Adora and smiles softly. Catra warned her that she would leave before Adora woke up so they said their goodbyes last night. Adora didn’t seem to be too happy that Catra was leaving.

Cracking her neck and stretching slightly, Catra sighs and then leaves the room, Melog padding quietly behind her. She almost wants to tell Melog to stay here and keep an eye on Adora, but she’s too afraid of her own mental health to do that. She knows that Melog has been a _huge_ help and she doesn’t want to lose that lifeline as she faces one of her greatest mistakes.

She meets a pair of architects Glimmer lent her for this very project at the castle gates. Both of them nod at her and turn to climb onto a set of three repainted skiffs, stocked full with tools and supplies. It’s still dark out when they leave Brightmoon but the moonlight is bright enough to clearly see where they’re headed.

They make good time in the skiffs and make it to Salineas about midday. Lonnie is already there waiting for them.

“What took you so long, Catra?” Lonnie asks.

“Didn’t leave till this morning,” Catra replies honestly as she steps off the skiff, a few former Horde soldiers she barely recognizes start pulling the supplies off.

“Spending as much time as you can with Adora?” Lonnie asks with a knowing grin. Catra shrugs.

“Yeah, pretty much. I’m worried about her.”

“What’d blondie do this time?” Catra hesitates and glances around carefully.

“She’s sick. The doctors aren’t entirely sure why. She’s recovering, but very slowly,” Catra replies quietly. Lonnie pales slightly.

“Shit. You’re joking.” Catra shakes her head.

“The Heart kind of fucked her over pretty good. Try not to spread that around though. I’d rather not have some pretentious asshole thinking that they can get the jump on her while she’s sick,” Catra asks and Lonnie nods, giving her a strange look.

“You’ve changed, Catra. Should’ve known just from the hair though.”

“Yeah, well, hitting rock bottom and then getting chipped will do that to you.”

Lonnie pales again. “ _Fuck_ , you were _chipped_?!”

Catra merely nods and begins walking towards the construction site. The tents have already been set up and Lonnie’s already gotten those that were here started on clearing the rubble and figuring out which buildings need to get demolished entirely and which ones just need repairs. Lonnie catches up to Catra and punches her shoulder.

“Dammit Catra, you can’t just tell me you were chipped and walk off like that!” Lonnie hisses. Catra sighs.

“What do you want me to say, Lonnie? It sucked, but we’ve got a job to do. I’m hoping to get enough permanent homes done so that the first wave of Mermista’s people have someplace to stay when they get here,” Catra replies. Lonnie gives her a strange look.

“Alright then, where do we start?”

Catra snorts. “Talk to the architects I brought with me for that. They’re going to inspect the buildings and then start directing people on where to go and what to do.”

“You’re not leading this thing?”

Catra shakes her head. “No, in fact, I’m going to try and keep it so Mermista doesn’t even know I’m here.”

“. . . Why?”

Catra doesn’t really want to explain herself to Lonnie, but she doesn’t know how to tell her off without yelling. Melog bumps their head into Catra’s thigh and she’s shocked by how much she relaxes in response. She didn’t even realize she had gotten tense.

“Look, Lonnie. I fucked up, alright. _A lot_. You _know_ this. If I can keep Mermista’s anger directed towards me and not the other Horde soldiers, I might be able to give them a chance to find a life in Salineas. In order for that to work, I _can’t be here_. Don’t get me wrong, I’m going to be helping with the restoration. I can’t just _not_ help with the restoration, not after what I’ve done. But if Mermista asks, I’m not here. Tell her you were asked by Sparkles or something.”

Lonnie blinks at her in confusion. “You . . .”

“I’ll likely be on the other side of the city whenever Mermista’s here. Better yet, I can start working on one of the smaller surrounding cities if it proves to be too difficult to stay out of most people’s sight. The architects are aware that I want to keep my involvement a secret. Melog will likely be a huge help in this.”

“So, this is why you wanted us to say it’s a request from Queen Glimmer?”

Catra nods and Lonnie frowns at her.

“I’m not gonna lie to you, that’s a little fucked up but I’ll play along. Does the queen know?”

Catra nods. “We’ve discussed this. She’s not happy with my decision but eventually conceded that if Mermista was truly pissed at the Horde for destroying her kingdom, which she _is_ , this was a good way to redirect that anger. She looked like she swallowed a lemon though.”

Lonnie chuckles. “I imagine so . . . The architects are really in charge of this thing? I don’t think most of these soldiers are going to listen to them.”

Catra shrugs. “Then knock some sense into them or lead them yourself. I don’t care. I’m just going to do whatever the fuck the architects tell me.”

Lonnie sighs, but nods. “Alright. I’ll let them know. Are you sure about this though, Catra? Seems a bit self-destructive, even for you.”

“Oh, trust me, I’m well aware but it takes a lot to knock me down and for whatever reason, Adora seems insistent on keeping me on my feet.”

Lonnie nods but looks at her concerned. Eventually, she sighs and walks away to talk to the architects mentioned. Catra on the other hand, heads deeper into the ruined city, picks a random building, and starts clearing away the debris from inside.

She’s six hours into her self-assigned task when Lonnie finds her.

“Goddamn, you’re hard to find,” Lonnie whines. Catra gives her a flat look.

“That was kind of the point,” she responds.

“Did you even eat?” Catra pulls an empty ration bar wrapper from her pocket in response.

“You’re still eating those things?” Lonnie asks amazed and Catra shrugs.

“It’s better than amniotic fluid.”

“. . . _the fuck is amniotic fluid?!_ ”

“Be glad you never got chipped,” Catra merely says in response. Lonnie shakes her head. “You need anything?”

“Yeah, the architects wanted to know where you were.”

“Alright, I’ll track them down in a bit.”

Lonnie nods, looks around, and whistles. “You got a lot done. This is one was one we’d marked for potential demolishing, but it doesn’t look too bad now that you cleared out all the debris.”

Catra’s ears tuck briefly in panic.

“Fuck, this one was marked for demolishing?”

Lonnie shrugs. “By us, not by the architects. The architects have actually been able to save a lot more buildings than we thought.”

“That’s good. We’ll save more time that way.”

Lonnie opens her mouth to respond but there’s a screeching noise from outside and a whoosh of displaced air. Both occupants of the room blink.

“The fuck was that?” Lonnie asks and the two of them move to look outside one of the shattered windows. Both Lonnie and Catra shriek as the head of some giant bird reaches through the window. They both jump away and Catra’s fast but she’s clearly not fast _enough_ because the creature snags her by the shirt with its beak and drags her out the window. Lonnie and Melog both race back and watch as the creature, a giant bird with four wings and a long tail, holds a screeching, very pissed, and probably terrified Catra in its beak.

Then the bird _heaves_ with its wings and twists. Lonnie blinks as the bird and Catra disappear in a swirl of magic light.

Melog, who’s now turned red with fear, hisses, and races outside of the room and down the steps of the building to the exit. Lonnie, after a moment of stunned confusion, follows.

It takes her far too long to get her hands on a communicator. Even longer still to get a hold of Queen Glimmer. Apparently, the Queen was busy with some sort of emergency.

By the time the Queen picks up, Lonnie’s made a noticeable path in the dirt outside of her tent.

“Uh . . . Lonnie was it? What seems to be the matter?” Glimmer asks, confused because why was a former Horde soldier reaching out to _her_?

“Catra got kidnapped by a giant four-winged bird and I just thought you should know.”

“Yeah, I’m well aware. It brought her here.”

“. . . So, she’s fine.”

“Yep, but we’re now investigating into why a group of Etherian animals decided to kidnap people.”

“Wait, this happened to _others_ too?!”

“Yeah, Adora got relocated by a boar and a squirrel. A baby boar, might I add because if it was full-grown, there was no way it was going to fit through those doors.”

“ _What the fuck_?”

“It’s fine. It was all Adora’s fault. Is Melog with you?”

“. . . who?”

“Catra’s cat.”

“No, it turned all red and took off after Catra was snatched.”

“ . . . Great. Alright, thanks for letting me know.”

“Yeah, no problem.” Glimmer hangs up and Lonnie stares at the communicator stunned for several long moments.

“ _What the fuck?_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to know what the four-winged bird creature looks like, take a look at chapter 2 of another work in the series: "The People of Etheria".


	5. More Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Razz comes to visit and only gives Adora more questions than answers.

Catra doesn’t want to leave Adora alone the next day and go to Salineas, but Adora insists, knowing how much repairing that city meant to Catra, and promises that she will stay in her room for the day. Catra, reluctantly, manages to convince Glimmer to teleport her back to Salineas and makes Sparkles promise that she will pick up Catra when the day is done. Glimmer throws a bit of a fit about becoming the cat hybrid’s taxi service, but the complaining and goading are mostly just for show and Glimmer is fully willing to teleport Catra to Salineas and back if it means that Adora will take care of herself better.

After Catra leaves, Adora is left alone in her room. Melog, who had found their way to Brightmoon sometime in the night, went again with Catra, this time staying much closer to the cat hybrid’s side, not willing to be left behind again. (The four-winged kidnapper from the day before did not bring Melog along as well and the alien cat wasn’t looking to repeat that experience.)

For several long, boring moments, Adora lays in her bed, bored but not knowing what else to do. Back in the Horde, she didn’t do anything other than train in her free time. During the war, she also didn’t do anything other than train in her free time. There’s nothing she remembers (aside from eating but Glimmer and Bow both insisted that that didn’t count and Catra just laughed when she brought it up) that she can use as a hobby.

She tried knitting before, when her body was at its weakest after Prime’s defeat because Glimmer’s aunt seemed to really enjoy it and it _looked_ like something that was repetitive and easy enough for her to try, but she didn’t seem to have a knack for it and let Melog ( ~~and Catra~~ ) play with the leftover yarn.

Granted, she never actually asked anybody to teach her _how_ to knit so the desire was doomed from the start. She simply just convinced Catra to go into town and buy her a “thing” of yarn and then proceeded to study the sweater Castaspella made her intently and try to replicate it. It did not go well and she ended up with a knotted, tangled mess that Adora could sort of fit around her midsection. (The resulting creation was an offense to all things knitted. Adora didn’t know to use knitting needles and simply just tied the thread in a convincing pattern and looped the thread around to fill in the gaps.)

Sighing loudly, Adora resolves herself to sit through another long, boring day. She _hates_ this weakness, illness, whatever it was, with her whole soul. She feels as though she went from the strongest person in the universe to the weakest. But she can’t regret it. She would do it again, trade what little strength she feels she has left if it means keeping her friends, her _family_ , safe.

She _is_ getting stronger though. Yesterday caused a bit of a setback, which _sucks_ , but she’s still a lot stronger, a lot _lighter_ than what she’d been the day after Prime’s defeat. So, the progress, even if it feels almost nonexistent, is still there.

Lying in bed, bored out of her mind, makes her drowsy, and she’s thankful to the stars above that she can just sleep through this boredom instead of suffering because she _promised_ she would rest and she doesn’t want to break a promise to Catra. Not again.

She wakes up to the sound of voices. Not Glimmer or Bow or Catra though so it takes her mind a minute to figure out who it is. One of them is Swiftwind’s, she realizes after a moment, and the other is older, almost grandmotherly . . . wait, _Madam Razz?_

Adora opens her eyes and is immediately met with that fuzzy disconnected feeling you get after sleeping for too long. Her limbs are still far too heavy, and her body doesn’t really want to move but she forces herself to sit up so that she can look at her impromptu guests properly.

Madam Razz seems to light up at the sight of her.

“Adora, dearie, how are you feeling?”

“Madam Razz? What are you doing here?” Her speech is slurred with sleep and Swiftwind reaches over to hand her a glass of water. Adora takes it and drinks some even though she’s a little bit uncertain about drinking from a glass that Swiftwind had to put his lips all over in order to carry.

Adora’s never seen Madam Razz this far from her hut, let alone even outside of the Whispering Woods. Swiftwind leans over to whisper in her ear.

“I was doing my usual patrol when I saw her in the woods through the trees, a ways away from her hut. I asked her what she was doing and she told me to bring her here,” Swiftwind explains, but it doesn’t seem to explain anything that’s going on.

“I came to see you, dearie! The woods told me that you had a bit of an incident yesterday and there had to be an intervention. That’s no good!” Razz bonks Adora on top of the head gently with her broom which only makes Adora more confused because _why did Razz bring her broom and what intervention?_ “You won’t get any better if you don’t _rest_.”

“Razz, what intervention?” Adora is _so_ _confused_. She knows she’s not the brightest and she tends to think with her muscles more than her brain but Razz isn’t really making much sense to her. Not that the old woman makes much sense to her normally.

Razz doesn’t even really answer the question. “Your body needs _time_ to heal and adjust to the full strength of Etheria’s magic. You are not Etherian so it’s taking a little bit longer for you, but you must give this time. Once you are better, then you can become She-Ra again, but you mustn’t try before then.”

Adora freezes and blinks because _she hadn’t even thought about She-Ra since falling ill_. She hadn’t needed her since Prime’s defeat. She hadn’t even _considered_ that she might not be able to transform again.

She reaches out with her hand and starts to reach within herself to summon the sword and gets bonked much harsher than before on the head with a broom while simultaneously having her hand slapped for her efforts. Adora just blinks as Razz gets close to her face and wags a finger at her.

“No,” Razz says firmly and Adora merely smiles sheepishly.

Adora watches, still confused as Razz bustles around her room, knocking things over and muttering to herself.

“Razz, what’s going on?”

Razz gives her a confused stare. “I told you, dearie, you need to rest.”

Adora wants to groan in frustration. “No, Razz, that’s not what I meant. What did you mean by intervention? I got kidnapped by a _boar and a squirrel_ yesterday.”

“Warthog, dearie, warthog.”

“Okay, fine, warthog, but why was it kidnapping me?”

“Kidnapping? Oh no, they never meant you any harm. They were simply trying to keep you from hurting yourself.”

“Razz, that doesn’t . . . _why?!_ ”

Razz comes forward to poke Adora in the chest. “You are She-Ra, champion of Etheria,” Razz says like that explains everything.

Adora sighs loudly. “I know that Razz, but I still don’t understand.”

“It doesn’t matter. You will understand soon.”

_“Razz_.”

Razz proceeds to knock over a few more items in the room, even going so far as to empty a few drawers in her dresser and sweeping some of the items into larger piles, before nodding satisfied. Adora merely watches the chaos unfold as she doesn’t have the strength to get up and stop her. Not that she’s sure she could even stop Razz, to begin with.

Razz turns to her and smiles. “Now, dearie, take it easy and rest. Your strength will return soon, it always does.” And with that, Razz turns with a nod and exits the room. Adora only has the chance to stutter out a few waits before the mysterious old lady is gone. It takes her far too long to untangle herself from her bedsheets and get to her feet. Even still, Swiftwind has to balance her as she stumbles to the door and opens it.

She spends several long moments staring down the hallway and wondering because Razz is nowhere in sight and she doesn’t know if that’s simply because Razz moves that quickly or if there’s some sort of magic involved. Both are highly likely.

There’s a chime similar to far off bells and the sound of displaced air and suddenly Glimmer is teleporting in with Bow, both of their hands full with steaming trays of food.

“Adora! We brought food! What are you doing up?” Glimmer asks and Adora takes a moment to look at her and then back down the hallway.

“Razz was here, she . . .” Adora pauses. She doesn’t know how to finish that sentence.

“Madam Razz? She’s okay?” Bow asks and Adora nods.

“Yeah, she seemed fine. Just as confusing as normal though.” Adora opens the door wider and steps back to let her friends in.

“Razz? Didn’t you say that she kept to her hut though in the Whispering Woods?” Glimmer asks as she walks through the door. She’s heard of Madam Razz from Adora and Swiftwind but hasn’t met the old lady. Glimmer takes one look at the mess Razz left in her wake and grunts. "What happened in here?"

"Razz," Adora replies flatly. 

“Oh, hey Swiftwind, how was patrol?” Bow asks as he catches sight of the winged horse.

“The same as usual. Super peaceful. I did help out a few travelers with a broken wagon though,” Swiftwind responds.

“So, what did Razz want?” Glimmer asks, partially because she found it a little bit concerning that a crazy old lady from the Woods managed to get into Brightmoon without her knowing, not to mention the _day_ after one of her best friends gets kidnapped by a bunch of forest animals.

Adora walks over to her bed and sits down, trying to ignore how tired she still feels despite having slept half the day away.

“She said she came to see me but a lot of what she said was sort of confusing, which is typical for her but I really hoped with Etheria saved there wouldn’t be any riddles left,” Adora responds a bit grumpily.

“What did she say that was confusing?” Bow asks.

“She said something about an intervention yesterday and I think she meant the whole boar, sorry warthog, and squirrel incident but she didn’t really explain it and honestly I don’t even know how she _knows_ about it. And she . . . kinda made it sounds like my body is adjusting to the full strength of Etheria’s magic which doesn’t make any sense cause wouldn’t the other princesses _also_ be affected by something like that?”

“Is she normally that confusing?” Bow asks. Adora groans and lays back down on the bed, throwing a hand over her eyes.

“ _Yes_. Though I’m starting to be able to understand her pretty well. She was surprisingly clear and direct with her statements today, she just didn’t _explain_ much.”

“Yeah, you should have heard her when she was still confusing Adora with Mara. She was a lot harder to follow,” Swiftwind comments. Adora makes a grunt of agreement. Glimmer and Bow share a look of concern.

“Did she say anything else?” Glimmer asks gently.

“She was really insistent that I have to rest,” Adora grumbles.

“You _do_ need to rest. You’re sick, Adora. You won’t get any better if you don’t rest,” Bow agrees.

“But it’s been _weeks_!” Adora shouts and Glimmer climbs on to the bed to sit next to her.

“I know. And I really wish we knew what was going on, but so much seems to be happening lately with you sick, cities needing to be rebuilt, Horde clones needing to be taught how to be individuals, and the animals-.” Glimmer stops herself but Adora is already sitting upwards. The blonde takes a moment to press a hand to her forehead to try and keep the world from spinning as she moved far too quickly before grabbing Glimmer’s shoulder.

“Animals? What about the animals?” Adora asks.

“Well, a lot of the wildlife has been acting kind of strangely? Like nobody’s been attacked or anything but several creatures have been delivering wood, food, and raw materials to construction workers and helping with various other tasks. It’s been a bit confusing because some of these creatures have been species that have previously been pretty hostile, like the giant spiders in the Whispering Woods,” Bow responds and Adora stares at him, stunned.

“Wait, when were you guys going to tell me this?” Adora asks. Both Bow and Glimmer resist the urge to wince.

“We didn’t want you worrying about it. You’ve been so sick lately, we didn’t want you to hurt yourself trying to figure out what was going on. Like Bow said, nobody’s been hurt. We just haven’t figured out yet what’s going on though. Perfuma and Scorpia have been working on it,” Glimmer reassures.

Adora groans and lays back down. “I wish I could help. I hate feeling this useless.”

Glimmer sighs and pats her arm. “I know.”

“Did Razz say anything about when you would get better?” Bow asks as he too moves to sit on the bed.

“Yeah, soon,” Adora grumbles. Glimmer and Bow both look at her worriedly.

“Hopefully that means you’ll be better in a week or so,” Glimmer adds unhelpfully and Adora groans louder.

“ _I don’t think I could survive another week of this_ ,” she hisses.

“Well, you can survive the next hour or so because we brought food, and let’s eat before it gets too cold,” Glimmer says. At the mention of food, Adora sits up quickly again, stomach already growling and mouth pooling a bit with drool. Glimmer and Bow both laugh and Adora pouts for a bit before joining in with them.

She’s still worried about all the strange things that have been happening but knows that with her friends, she’ll be able to pull through.

She always does.

Later, after Glimmer and Bow leave, Adora glances around her still trashed room, and chuckles warmly. Swiftwind gives her a look.

"What are you laughing at?" Swiftwind asks. Adora throws her hand out to gesture at the mess.

"Razz," she replies. "She might be crazy but she's really really smart."

"Okay, yeah, I knew that. I thought _you_ knew that so why are you bringing this up?"

"She trashed my room so I would have something to do."

Swiftwind opens and closes his mouth a few times before replying. "I don't know if Razz's craziness has gotten to you or if you're actually right and Razz isn't quite as crazy and I was thinking earlier."

" _I have something to do, Swifty."_

"Yeah, no, her craziness is infectious apparently. I'd love to say it hasn't gotten to me too but I'm a talking horse so. . ."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, more confusion! I tried very hard to stay true to the show's characters' personalities, Razz is a little bit hard to write. I rewrote several scenes to try and stay truer to the show. I'm not sure I entirely succeeded but I'm hoping it's still close enough.


	6. Progress is Fragile but its Still There

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: I combined "Champion" and "Out of the Shadows and Into the Light". If you have not read "Out of the Shadows and Into the Light" but remember reading this work at some point in the past, please go back and read chapter 4 of this story. Thank you!!

Barring the hiccup on the first day where Catra was snatched by a four-winged bird, the reconstruction of Salineas proceeds quickly. It’s only been a few days since they started, but already, Salinean citizens are starting to show. The first group showed up two days ago, really only a handful of people though. There was a bit of apprehension about former Horde soldiers rebuilding Salineas, but Etherians in general tend to be an incredibly forgiving bunch and after the nightmare that was the reign of Horde Prime, both Horde soldiers and not came to a sort of understanding.

At this point, the architects and workers had managed to get a few buildings in working condition. They weren’t _pleasant_ , just livable. For now, they would focus on getting a decent number of buildings in working condition and _then_ think about making them look nicer.

After actually speaking with the architects this time instead of diving right into clearing away the rubble, Catra had been focusing her attention on one of the taller shell-like buildings furthest from the shores. Most of the taller buildings such as this one had been structurally compromised in the attack and collapsed. This one was one of the few still standing. There wasn’t much damage in the building to begin with, but there was enough to keep her occupied for a few days in order to make the building livable and safe for smaller children. Much of the glass had shattered and some of the shell had been broken in the lower sections, leaving the floor covered in thousands of sharp bits. Luckily the floors of this building were made of some sort of hard, smooth stone, not carpet, so the pieces were quickly swept up and handled. However, Catra quickly learned that she needed to run over the floor _again_ with a wet cloth to pick up the pieces difficult to see.

She really needed to invest in _shoes_.

Today, Catra is working on patching the holes in the wall. The architects had given her a skiff loaded with some sort of compound, water, and large stones. They don’t have the ability to make the shell-like houses look as they did before. _Apparently,_ the shells were the forgotten homes of some ancient sea creature, dragged up from the depths of the ocean. In other words, the shells weren’t even built by the Salineans, just found and repurposed.

Catra doesn’t know if she appreciates the thought of a sea creature of that magnitude existing because going off of what’s happening elsewhere in the world, She Ra and by default, Adora, probably brought them back as well.

That being said, the architects had devised a compound that when mixed with a certain amount of water, will quickly bond to both stone and shell. Good enough to patch the hole, but not look exactly like the shell.

Catra pulls on a pair of forearm length gloves she persuaded Glimmer to buy for her for this exact purpose. Most gooey, sticky substances are absolute _hell_ to get out of her fur and if the compound truly does solidify as fast as the architects said it would, she has no desire to risk it.

She carefully pours out the desired amount of compound and water, making sure to only make a small amount at a time because she doesn’t want to make too much and then have it solidify on her, and then slathers a thick layer onto the broken edge of the shell and starts sticking the brick-like rocks on it. The shell is surprisingly thick, but she shouldn’t be so surprised. It has to be, to hold up its own weight, let alone the weight of all the rooms and necessities built inside of it.

Melog helps, shapeshifting to a more humanoid form. The compound doesn’t stick to them; something about them being a creature composed entirely of magic makes it difficult for the stuff to do so.

Together, they make a decent team, quietly patching the hole. Catra isn’t one to do much talking and Melog seems to respect that. Normally the quietness provokes Catra’s thoughts to wander and focus on her guilt and mistakes, but Melog can sense the instant Catra’s mood starts to go sour and pounces on Catra the moment that happens. Laying and mewling until Catra either cheers up or relents and talks things over.

There’s not as much gentle prodding with Melog now. Not after the alien cat figured out that the best way to get Catra to talk is by pouncing on her and not letting her up until she did. Catra both hates and appreciates it.

Hates it because she always feels so _raw_ and _vulnerable_ after they talk. Appreciates it because this is the most mentally stable Catra has been in a _long time_.

She also hates the way Melog will swat her sometimes when her thoughts stray and she starts wondering _how in the world_ people have started accepting her for who she was, mistakes, trauma, anger, and all.

By the time lunchtime hits, they’ve patched two rather large holes. The compound does indeed bond quickly, which allows them to move quickly and conform to the shape of the shell. Catra is slightly concerned about the strength of the compound if it sets so quickly but the architects assured her that there was nothing to worry about. She pulls out a couple of ration bars and water as Melog begins to take compound and smooth over the rocks, making it look more like one solid spot rather than a patchwork of rocks.

For a short while, even after she finishes her food, she leans against the wall and watches. She’s tired and sore and somehow she knows this exhaustion stems from more than just the work. She’d hoped that rebuilding Salineas would help with this slump she’d found herself stuck in, but it’s really not. Because it doesn’t change the fact that she’s done what she’s done. Melog turns to her in concern, picking up on her decrease in mood and she waves them off. She’s fine.

Catra’s ears twitch as she picks up on somebody walking towards the building they’ve been working on. Focusing, Catra tries to figure out if she knows the person based on the breathing, heartbeat, and stumbling they seem to be doing. Almost instantly she recognizes Kyle and is immediately confused.

Why would _Kyle_ be seeking her out? Unless they had nobody else to send, which was certainly plausible. She walks to the entrance of the building and opens the door just in time to see Kyle stumble to the ground and groan pitifully.

He looks a bit beat up, a few bruises and bandages. And his hands are scraped up and a bit bloody, probably from picking up rubble for days on end. Catra steps forward to offer Kyle a hand up silently. Kyle swallows with nervousness, the last time he’d seen her she was an emotional wreck, lashing out at everything, but grabs her hand anyways and lets her pull him to his feet.

“Need something?” Catra decides to get straight to the point. Kyle blinks at her in shock for a few moments because while her words are blunt, the venom and anger in her voice is gone, instead replaced with an exhausted sort of indifference.

“Uh, y-yeah. Lonnie wanted me to tell you that Princess Mermista is back,” Kyle responds and Catra’s ears almost immediately flatten on her head. Suddenly, Melog is there, pressing into Catra’s side, grounding her. She closes her eyes and takes a calming breath.

“Shit, I thought I had more time,” Catra mutters. But really it makes sense, it’s been almost a week since they’ve started and almost three since Mermista left to start telling people to head back to Salineas. “Alright, thanks for the heads up.”

Kyle nods but doesn’t leave immediately, instead watching Catra as she heads back into the building and pulls on her gloves to start mixing compound again.

She lets him watch her for several minutes even as she finishes mixing compound and begins to help Melog smooth the patch over, but his presence makes her anxiety spike and eventually, she can’t take it anymore.

“Was there something else you needed?” She tries so hard not to snap at him, and she only barely succeeds. Even still, there’s a certain edge to her voice.

Kyle seems to pick up on it and winces. “N-no, sorry. It’s just. . . Lonnie said you were different now,” he stumbles on his words a bit.

Catra’s ears tuck further down on her head and she pauses in her work. She swallows, carefully considering her next words. “Not really. It’s not a good idea for you to be around me. I’m not. . . I’m trying but. . . I’m not safe yet. . . Not sure I’ll ever be,” she responds quietly. Kyle simply tilts his head at her response.

He doesn’t know how to respond. Lonnie was right. Catra _did_ change. But then again so did he. He’s not the same whimpering kid he had been in the Horde and he’s not sure he knows the woman standing in front of him anymore. The Catra from before was all anger, and hissing, and claws, and _pain_. The Catra in front of him now still has that same pain but with it comes an almost crippling sort of vulnerability. The Catra from before _never_ showed vulnerability, _never_ showed weakness.

This was unfamiliar territory to him and it was sort of terrifying because this was _Catra_. And Catra had been one of the things he learned to _fear_ while in the Horde.

But at the same time, he remembers way back when Adora was in the Horde, when Catra was just a little bit more gentle, not as gentle as she is _now_ but . . . she wasn’t too bad back then, before She Ra.

Time, though, has made him realize that for as awful as Catra was to them, they were just as awful back. Being away from the Horde has made him realize what that kind of environment has done to them, what it did to Catra, because he _knows_ Catra had it bad.

He doesn’t quite know if he can say it was _worse_ yet. Because he truly doesn’t know Catra. Doesn’t really know what happened between her and Adora and Shadow Weaver behind the steely walls of the Horde.

Part of him is afraid to truly think about it because he knows that Lonnie’s and Catra’s relationship drove deeper than just harsh words. Looking back, he _knows_ that it was bullying. And he’s afraid to admit that that’s what was happening because if _that_ was the case then he’d have to admit that _he’d_ been bullied too. And that would be a problem because he’s so _tired_ of dealing with issues that he just wants to forget and move on.

He knows he needs help, but he doesn’t exactly know how to ask.

And looking at Catra now, he knows she needs help too. They probably all do.

So even though he’s afraid of getting yelled at or scratched, he picks up a spare trowel from beside the tub of mixed compound, scoops some of it up, and walks over to help. Catra gives him an odd, almost scared look.

“Do you mind if I stick around for a bit and help?” he asks, even though the tool he’s holding is already covered in material.

Catra takes a deep breath and responds, “Lonnie doesn’t need you?”

Kyle shrugs. “She can make do without me.”

Catra studies him for a long moment and then nods, carefully. “You can stick around if you want. Not sure _why_ you want to stick around _me_ but . . .” She doesn’t finish her sentence.

“You’ve changed, Catra. I have too. Yeah, I’m sure there’s things to talk over and dirt to unravel, but for right now? I just want to get to know the real Catra, you know, not the angry, hissing Catra that scared the shit out of me in the Horde.”

Catra frowns and warns him, “I haven’t changed that much. I’m still liable to lash out.” She’s deathly afraid of it, really. Terrified that she’ll slip and ruin the fragile progress she’s made. She doesn’t want to hurt Kyle, but she doesn’t exactly have the best track record of not hurting people.

“Last time I saw you, you would have already.”

Catra doesn’t have anything to say to that.

They work in silence for several long moments before Kyle speaks up.

“How’s Adora? I know you two have reconnected and I haven’t really talked to her since she left. Even when I saw her at the tail end of the war she always seemed so distant.”

Catra shrugs and wonders how much she can tell him.

“Kyle, how well can you keep a secret?”

The teen in question looks at her funny. “I can hold a secret.”

The cat hybrid sighs as she bends down to get more compound and looks at him when she straightens. If any one of her old friends were to let a secret slip, it would probably be Kyle. But she also knows that Kyle would never give out a secret to somebody he didn’t trust and Kyle is a surprisingly good judge of character considering.

Well, perhaps not, he did claim to be friends with her at one point.

She decides to tell him anyway, because Melog is telling her to trust him and she trusts Melog even more than herself.

“Adora is sick. She’s getting better but the Heart did something to her.”

Kyle almost drops his trowel in shock. “. . . Adora is _sick_?!”

It’s almost unbelievable because Adora’s always been practically _untouchable_. Even when she was in the Horde, Kyle could count on one hand the number of times Adora had been sick and even then she had bounced back quickly, far quicker than he had.

“How bad?” he dares to ask, because he would have thought, being She Ra and all, that illness wouldn’t affect her anymore.

“She can’t really move and she’s tired all the time. She’s not in pain or anything, she’s just . . . tired.”

“Is She Ra gone or something?” Because it wasn’t entirely unbelievable to think that She Ra used up all her energy restoring the planet and eradicating Horde Prime.

Catra shakes her head. “She Ra is still there. Or at least, Madam Razz says so. Adora just feels . . . heavy. It’s hard for her to move. We know it’s got something to do with She Ra and the Heart but . . . we don’t really know what’s going on.” Catra admits the last part quietly.

Kyle has no idea who Madam Razz is, but she must be important.

“You said she’s getting better though right?”

“Yeah, as long as she continues to take it easy. Dumbass managed to overwork herself the other day and she regressed a bit.”

Kyle shakes his head. It doesn’t surprise him.

“But otherwise, how is she? What’s she like now?”

Catra snorts. “Still a dumbass.”

Kyle laughs at that.

“But she’s happier now, I think,” Catra finished and Kyle nods.

“The Horde sucked,” he commented and Catra winces.

“Yeah, it was pretty bad.” The ears on her head had flattened again. “Look, Kyle. . .”

Kyle shakes his head and interrupts. “No. You’re not ready. I’m not ready. Just. . . give it time, alright?”

Catra tries to swallow down the guilt that’s threatening to tear her apart and nods. “Yeah.”

They continue in silence for a bit longer. Catra can _feel_ the awkward tension in the air, but she’s too afraid to mess up and say something wrong.

Kyle ends up being her savior. “Rogelio convinced me to try and take some engineering classes. He thinks I’ll be good at it.”

Catra recalls everything she knows about Kyle and nods. “Probably. Might be better at that than being a soldier.”

Kyle jerks as if he was struck, almost hitting Melog, a playful grin on his face. “ _I’ll have you know_ , that I was a _great_ soldier.”

Catra almost plays back but she’s afraid of hurting Kyle’s feelings so her jaw snaps closed from where it loosened to speak and she thinks a little bit longer about what she’s going to say before she does so.

“You were okay,” she finally says and Kyle grins at her.

“So where on earth did you pick up a magical cat?” Kyle asks and Catra blinks, because it takes her a moment to realize he’s talking about _Melog_ , who at some point had shifted back to their cat form and had moved closer to Catra as if recognizing the fact that Catra was moments away from having a nervous breakdown.

“ _Melog?_ ” She asks, “Eh, picked them up on an alien planet.”

“ _Seriously?_ ” Kyle’s head whips over to look at Melog who mewls at him. “That’s an _alien?!_ ”

“They can fully understand you. I just happen to be the only one that can understand them for whatever reason.”

“ _Really?!_ That’s so cool!”

Catra shrugs but smiles and reaches down to scratch Melog’s head who butts her thigh with a purr.

“How are the classes going so far?” she asks and Kyle grins at her and opens his mouth and Catra blinks because she doesn’t know if he closes it afterwards.

“ _Absolutely amazing_. I’m learning _so much_. Like I don’t think I’ll ever be at Princess Entrapta’s level. Quite frankly, I don’t think anybody _can_ be but even still. My teacher taught us how to create _real_ blueprint diagrams and actually do the math to predict whether or not an invention might work and _so many more of my experiments are working_ and its _so cool_. Like I made this device the other day that-,” Kyle continues to talk and Catra lets him. Because as long as he’s talking, she can ground herself easier and her thoughts don’t wander so bad.

It’s almost nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter almost spiraled out of control so many times. Catra was extremely hard to write, especially considering this sort of slump she's in. As it is, it kind of feels like Catra's dancing on the edge of recovery and something far worse WAY more than I had initially intended. I apologize for the late update, I meant to get it done far sooner but college and work and things happened and I kind of forgot about it for a bit?


	7. Humming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let me add more craziness to this story, IT'S FINE.

For the first time in like a _month,_ she can comfortably walk around without feeling faint, and it's _glorious._ She even _ran_ this morning (just down the hall) and she didn’t feel weak or super heavy after. And yeah, she had gotten far more winded with just that short bit of running than she would have during the war but _still_. The guards came rushing over with how loud she’d screamed her victory. She might have gotten a little embarrassed for alarming them but she couldn’t bring herself to regret it.

Because _finally,_ she could _move_.

She’d been running around just because she _could_. Or rather, not quite running. Sometimes she jogged a bit, but for the most part, she just kept to a brisk walk. Luckily, Bow or Glimmer hadn’t caught her yet (she knows they would yell and warn her not to overexert herself again). But something tells her that whatever illness she had is gone for good and she’s officially on the road to recovery. Rebuilding the lost muscle mass is going to be a _pain in the ass_ but she probably won’t need it anymore. Now that the war is done.

She couldn’t really appreciate that before when she was basically bedridden. It didn’t _feel_ like it was over when she was fighting a battle with her body. And it _definitely_ didn’t feel over when she was cutting vegetables in the kitchens for recovery efforts.

And in that sense, it's not really over. Etheria took a hard hit. It will take a while for them to adjust. There were a lot of people that died in the war, people that died too far back for She-Ra’s magic to bring them back (she’s heard about the fact that several people had fallen into the fractures created by the unstable Heart, only to be brought back moments later as She-Ra’s magic healed the planet). And many people scattered when Horde Prime came, fearful for their lives and desperate to avoid him. (Not that it mattered. Prime had practically completely taken over the planet in a matter of hours. The small camp they had set up in the Whispering Woods was the extent of the people the collective effort of all the Princesses could protect from Prime. Relative to the population of the planet, this camp was minuscule.)

To top that off, She-Ra’s magic restored plant and wildlife across the entire globe which made things . . . difficult when people tried to go back to their homes only to find them covered in vines. Not every village was covered. Strangely it was only the temporary homes and the Fright Zone that were completely taken over. Other areas experienced an almost extreme increase in plant life but not enough to take over preexisting structures.

So now that she was healed, she could _finally_ appreciate the fact that the war was over. And also figure out what she was doing next because she _knows_ that Glimmer and Bow have been extremely busy in trying to figure out how to stabilize Etheria’s political and economic status enough so that they _can_ disappear for months at a time to restore life to other planets as well.

They have time though. Because Adora still needs time to make a full recovery and there’s an _energy_ to the air that she is starting to sense. Before she thought it was just relief and happiness that Prime was gone, the war is done, and Catra is _back_. But as the days go by, the feeling only gets stronger.

Today is the strongest its ever been. It practically vibrates her bones, which scares her a bit because she doesn’t understand what’s happening. But it doesn’t give her a feeling of _wrong_. It feels extremely _right_ instead.

But she doesn’t quite trust her instincts. Not after she trusted Shadow Weaver for years. And yes, her instincts led her right with Catra, Glimmer, Bow, and pretty much everybody else she met after she defected, but she can’t quite fully trust herself after the blunder that was Shadow Weaver.

So now she’s looking for Glimmer because Glimmer might have a clue as to what’s going on.

She hopes it’s not a She-Ra thing. She’s tired of there being a She-Ra thing.

Very faintly, she picks up on an odd sort of humming the air that only gets louder the closer she gets to the bend in the hallway. Adora’s brow furrows because the noise is strange and unfamiliar and she _really_ hopes it's not anything dangerous because she is _not_ sure if she can become She Ra at the moment.

The humming is prickling at the hair on her arms and vibrating her chest and it’s sort of starting to freak her out so she bolts around the corner and—

-runs right into Micah.

“Whoa there!” Micah’s hands carefully lay on Adora’s shoulders to steady her as she stumbles in bewilderment. “You alright? Should you even be running around the castle?”

Adora relaxes slightly at the sight of him. But the humming is still there so she can’t quite relax completely. She likes Micah. He visited her quite frequently while she was bedridden, perhaps even more so than Glimmer and Bow.

“Your majesty! Great, you’re here! Do you hear that humming? Cause it's sort of getting louder and it's kind of starting to freak me out?” Adora asks, on the verge of nervously rambling.

“Humming? And I thought I told you to just call me Micah. I’m not really the king anymore,” Micah asks thoughtfully, with his head a bit tilted. “Adora, I don’t hear any humming. What does it sound like?”

Adora blinks for a moment because she knows she’s not the brightest but she’s not sure how to explain it any better than _humming_. “ _Humming_ ,” she emphasizes. “And it got louder right until I bumped into you and now it's kind of staying the same volume.”

“Is it really loud or just loud relative to what it was when you first heard it?” Micah asks. And this is why Adora really appreciates this man because he doesn’t look at her like she’s crazy when things like this happen.

“Relative to when I first heard it. It’s not really that loud.”

“Any particular tune?”

“. . . um what?”

“Does it sound like music?” Micah elaborates without missing a beat. Another thing Adora appreciates. She hates being looked at strangely for not understanding something cause she grew up in the Horde.

“No. It just sounds like one noise,” Adora tries to explain. Micah nods, his brow furrowed.

“Walk in the direction of the noise then. Let’s try to figure out what’s going on.”

So she does, she walks in the same direction she was going when it was getting louder but she pauses.

Because it just got quieter.

She turns around and walks back to Micah, brow furrowed.

“I think . . . I think it’s where you’re at.”

Micah nods and steps to the side and Adora’s eyebrows furrow even more if possible because if she wasn’t mistaken, she could have _sworn_ the humming just shifted.

She really hates this. Noises are more of Catra’s thing.

“Could you-?” She pauses. “This is going to sound really weird but could you walk around me?”

Micah blinks but does as she asks, deliberately walking around her. He’s not even halfway around when Adora starts freaking out again.

“Why are _you_ humming?” she asks, looking at him. Micah squints at her and shakes his head slowly.

“Adora, I’m not humming. I don’t hear anything,” he responds, carefully.

“ADORA! You’re up!”

All the sudden, Bow starts tearing down the hall, skidding to a stop in front of Adora to gently wrap his arms around her and hug her tightly. Adora relaxes in his embrace, partially because Bow’s hugs are really nice and partially because Bow is _not_ humming.

Which suddenly makes her more concerned because what if that means it’s a side effect from Beast Island? What if Micah has some kind of illness? _What if Micah is being taken over by corrupted First One’s tech?_

Bow seems to sense her panic.

“Adora? Are you okay?” Bow asks.

“NO! Micah is _humming!_ ” Adora replies helpfully.

Bow glances at Micah who shrugs unhelpfully.

“She said she was hearing some kind of humming noise. Seems to be centered around me but I can’t hear it. Can you?” the former king asks and Bow shakes his head.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Bow asks Adora again.

“Yes! I feel great! But that’s not the point! This noise is the point!”

“Adora,” Bow starts. “I don’t hear anything. Maybe you should lay down for a bit longer?”

Adora looks at him like he kicked a puppy. “ _If I have to lay down any longer, I am going to explode_.”

There’s a chime and a whoosh of displaced air and Glimmer is shimmering into existence in front of them.

“Bow, have you-? ADORA! You’re up!” She also wraps her arm around Adora in an impromptu hug and Adora’s brain practically comes to a complete stop because _Glimmer is humming too_.

But Glimmer’s is _louder_ and _different_. Micah’s was just a flat noise, no varying tunes or sounds.

But _Glimmer’s_ has layers. There’s a basic layer not unlike Micah’s, flat, relatively monotone, and unchanging. But there’s another humming on top of that. It varies though, like the distant ring of some far-off bells and chimes, not unlike the noise that manifests whenever Glimmer teleports.

And all the sudden, it hits her, what the humming might be.

“Adora? Is everything alright?” Glimmer asks, a bit scared because Adora has been sick for a long time and she’s being uncharacteristically quiet and still.

“You’re humming too,” Adora whispers quietly.

“She is?” Both Micah and Bow ask at the same time.

“What?” Glimmer asks.

“I think I might know what this is,” Adora responds. “Is Castaspella still here?”

“Uh yeah, she’s in the planning room with Spinnerella and Netossa. Adora, what’s going on?” Glimmer asks. Adora shakes her head and takes off running, heading for the planning room. “Adora!”

All three of them share a look before Glimmer grabs their arms, teleports them to a few paces in front of Adora, grabs _Adora’s_ arm, and teleports the whole group to the planning room.

Glimmer folds her arms as soon as they appear.

“Can somebody tell me what’s going on now?”

Adora, distracted, blinks and looks around, because now that there’re multiple people in the same room, the humming is no longer just that, it’s a _harmony._

Castaspella hums the same way Micah does but it's quieter, not as loud or obvious, and it’s a bit drowned out by Glimmer and the other two princesses.

Spinnerella sounds like a gentle wind, soft and comforting. Netossa sounds like one of those large stringed instruments she’s seen being played by a few civilians in town, a harp if she remembers correctly. But there’s no particular tune, at least not one that Adora can recognize, which isn’t a huge accomplishment. But the noise almost sounds inquisitive and a bit confused which makes sense cause-

-they’re all staring at her expectantly and Adora fumbles for a moment because she really did just stare at them for several long moments.

Glimmer places a gentle hand on Adora’s shoulder.

“Adora? Are you okay? We’ve been calling you for several moments,” Glimmer asks and Adora stares at her for a moment because she still can’t quite get over the strange sort of harmony the different humming noises make altogether. It’s eerily beautiful.

“Yeah. . . yeah, I’m fine. I think . . . And this is going to sound absolutely crazy but. . . I think I can hear magic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, so I may or may not be winding up to make She-Ra into a greater powerhouse than she already is, but it's not completely unfeasible. Adora restored magic to Etheria, which implies that it was not exactly gone but depleted and/or sick beforehand. Now that it's restored, the planet will DEFINITELY go through some major changes (which I've sort of hinted at but not really cause I've been focusing on Adora and Catra). If I was a better writer, these changes would perhaps be more conclusive and obvious but alas I am what I am. In this sense, it's not entirely unfeasible to believe that She-Ra (if Etheria is her source of power as much as it is for the other Princesses) also goes through some changes. The Heart may have also been a source of the change. 
> 
> There is a reason for a lot of the strange choices I've been making including keeping the marks from the Heart. 
> 
> Also, I COMPLETELY forgot that Micah existed and desperately tried to write him in because there is NO WAY that Adora would have been practically bedridden for that long and not have been completely subjected to Micah's "dad mode". If I wasn't so impatient to be done with Adora's recovery, I might have written a chapter about it. (I still might, but not right now).
> 
> ALSO ALSO, I keep forgetting the dash between "She" and "Ra" is a thing


	8. Mermista

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mermista confronts Catra

Catra’s not even sure how it happened. She never heard her approach. She was minding her own business, patching yet another hole in a different building when all the sudden, _Princess Mermista, the fucking water princess,_ is quite literally _breathing down her neck_.

Not quite _literally_ literally. There was still a significant amount of space between the two of them. But the fur on the back of Catra’s neck is sensitive and she very _distinctly_ felt the displacement of air behind her and jumped about ten feet, shrieking.

Mermista bursts out laughing, leaning on her trident for support in her mirth as Catra stands there, eyes slitted and fur bristled.

Catra _doesn’t_ understand. Mermista wasn’t supposed to _see_ her, wasn’t supposed to know of her involvement. Melog was supposed to _warn_ her if Mermista got close.

But Melog couldn’t have warned her because Catra sent them off an hour ago to bring the updated recovery plans to Lonnie. She would have delivered them herself if she had gotten here early enough before the rest of the workers were up and about, but Glimmer had a late morning and she didn’t particularly want to listen in on potentially emotionally compromising conversations (she knew that both the former Horde and Salineans talked about her) as she snuck through the city.

Ergo, sending Melog off to deliver the plans as she started to get to work.

Catra forces her fur to relax and tries to still her racing heart as she forces her body to appear relaxed and uncaring.

Mermista is still chuckling with her hand up to wipe tears from her eyes as she does so.

“Goddamn Catra, I needed that,” the princess starts and Catra rolls her eyes.

“Glad I could be of some amusement to you,” Catra growls quietly. Mermista gives her an amused look before adopting a more serious one. Catra tries to keep her fur from standing on end again because Mermista’s eyes are cold and angry.

Catra can’t help but believe that she fully deserves anything the Princess of the kingdom she’s currently in will dish out.

“I knew that the recovery plans were too well thought out to be Glimmer’s,” Mermista states. “The fuck you doing out here though?”

Catra resists the urge to place a hand on the back of her neck because she’s still wearing those gloves which are completely covered in the compound.

She decides instead to feign indifference.

“What do you mean? There’s a hole. I’m _patching_ it,” Catra replies allowing a bit of her Horde confidence and irritation to slip into her voice.

Mermista frowns at her.

“You know what I meant.”

“No, really,” Catra starts. “I figured it didn’t matter where I started as long as I was working.” Which is partially true.

“Stop giving me false answers,” Mermista growls out and lunges forward to grab Catra by the front of her shirt. Catra’s eyes widen in partial fear before she forces the mask back into place and maintains her indifference. The water princess’ eyes get colder as she glares at her. “We both fully know what you would be way more helpful working directly with the recovery workers than out here by yourself. So tell me _what are you really doing out here, Catra?_ ”

Catra doesn’t respond right away which only serves to piss Mermista off even more.

Mermista shakes Catra a bit. “ _Answer me!”_ she snarls. Catra’s mask falls and her ears droop a bit. She swallows tightly before quietly responding.

“I didn’t think you wanted to see me,” Catra replies truthfully and quietly. Mermista watches her carefully.

“I _don’t_.”

“Didn’t think anybody really wanted to see me, much less work _with_ me and even less so _for me_. I thought it was better for everybody if I just kept to myself,” Catra continues quietly. “I just needed to help.”

Mermista watches her for a long moment before letting her go and backing away. Catra pulls off a glove so that she can finally rub her very sensitive neck.

Catra doesn’t know what to say. Doesn’t know if she _can_ say anything. Because there’s nothing in the world that she can say or do that can make things right, especially to Mermista. So she waits, awkwardly, almost wilting beneath Mermista’s heavy stare because she’s always been absolutely _awful_ at making friends and she knows she’ll never be friends with Mermista but Mermista is friends with _Adora_ which means that she _needs_ to be civil and _try_ to make things better.

But its _so so_ hard to face one of her greatest mistakes every single day for weeks on end and then face one of the people she’s hurt the most.

Mermista looks past her to the wall Catra was working on, back to Catra, and then sighs.

“Are you okay?” Mermista asks softly and Catra has to blink and try to restart her brain because what?

“I’m fine,” Catra replies and the response is short, clipped, and rushed. “Why?” Why ask if _she_ was okay?

“I’m sorry.” Is Mermista’s only response. “Didn’t mean to freak you out so badly.”

Catra tries to calm down. “I’m not—I’m fine.”

“Sure,” Mermista drawls. Mermista studies Catra again for a long time before sighing. “You really have changed, haven’t you? I knew you had to have. In order for Glimmer to be okay with you.” Mermista sighs again. “Ugghhhhh! I can’t hate you as much as I want to!”

Mermista presses a hand to her forehead.

“I don’t,” Catra starts before swallowing. “I don’t understand.”

“Do you know what cake is, Catra?”

Catra blinks, thoroughly confused.

“Yeah? Glimmer talks about it a lot.”

“Ever had it?”

“No.” Glimmer offered the day after they got back to the castle, but Catra was sick with guilt and worry for Adora and couldn’t stomach the thought of having anything to eat. She doesn’t remember eating anything that day. There have been many opportunities to have it since, but she immediately pegged it as something pleasant and therefore not something she should have. She typically went to the cafeteria and grabbed anything others didn’t appear to be grabbing whenever she wasn’t with Adora. And with Adora being so affected by her illness, it was rather easy to keep Adora distracted enough to avoid certain things.

“Do you know what a birthday is?”

Catra’s eyes narrow in focus. She _knows_ Adora mentioned this one. Not after the war though, sometime when they were on Darla headed back to Etheria.

“I don’t remember.”

“So you don’t know when yours is and you’ve never had a birthday party?”

“No?”

“Ever been to a festival?”

“No.”

“Ice skating?”

“No.”

“Have you ever played a game in your life?”

“Adora and I played tag as kids.”

“Just Adora and you?”

“Yeah.”

“Why not the others?”

Catra’s ears flatten to her head and she pauses because she doesn’t want to answer this question. She doesn’t understand why it’s important.

“I don’t understand,” Catra replies. Mermista doesn’t let up.

“Why not the others, Catra?”

Catra struggles to find the right words to say. “We didn’t get along.”

“Why?”

Catra hisses, eyes slitted and distressed. If Melog were here, they would be blazing red and probably lashing out at Mermista but they’re not. There’s tears brimming at the edges of her eyes because the answer to that question _hurts._

Catra swallows and slowly wills herself to speak.

“Because I was a monster back then as well,” the answer is whispered quietly and Catra presses her arm to her eyes to try and stop the tears from falling. She is only just starting to get the strength back to put a mask back in place when arms wrap around her.

Suddenly it’s a thousand times harder to keep herself together.

“I’m sorry,” Mermista says, “for pushing you like that, but I needed to know.” Catra is literally shaking with the effort required to keep herself from breaking down in front of this princess she’s only ever talked to when she was chipped. “Whoever made you believe that is wrong. Because _nobody_ is a monster, Catra. Not even Prime, even if he was an absolute _bastard_. I can’t hate you for what you did. Not when I know where you came from. Not when I know what Horde life was like. But I can’t forgive you for it. Not yet. But I also know, that despite the destruction, there was surprisingly few casualties. That all the heavy artillery aimed at the _buildings_ not the people.” Mermista pauses. “I can’t blame a soldier for their leader’s orders. And I can’t blame a tortured soul for their instability.”

Catra jerks, wrenching herself from Mermista’s hold.

“I’m _sorry_. I know it means nothing, but I’m _so sorry_ ,” Catra says.

Mermista nods. “I hear you, but it will take time to forgive.”

“Forgiveness is not something I deserve.”

“Maybe not, but since when have use princesses ever really listened to what was proper?” Mermista replies with a smirk. She watches Catra for a moment before getting serious again. “I don’t want to see you back here for another couple of days.”

“ _What-?!_ I can help! I _need_ to help!” Catra shouts. Mermista shakes her head.

“What you _need_ is help, Catra. Rebuilding Salineas isn’t going to take away the pain or the guilt. It’ll just distract you and let things fester until you’re worse off than you’ve ever been before because then you’ll be _directionless_. I want you to _try_ to make an attempt to reach out to somebody and _talk_ to them. Just pick somebody who has the qualifications to help. Ask Glimmer, she’ll know what I mean. And maybe it doesn’t half to be anybody professional. Maybe just meditate with Perfuma for a bit, I _don’t care_ , just. . . just get help okay? Adora is literally the happiest I’ve ever seen her with you. I don’t want to ruin that. And hell, _speaking_ of Adora, tell that dumb blonde she needs to do the same thing.”

“I still don’t _understand_.”

“That’s okay. If you do as I said, you _will_.”

The two stand in silence for a bit before Mermista continues. “When you get back, come to the main work tents. Things will go a thousand times smoother with you directly organizing things rather than just passing along general plans on a piece of paper.”

Catra nods cause she doesn’t know if she can say anything more right now. Mermista groans and moves to leave.

“I need to get back to work. I’ll see you around, Catra.”

And then she’s gone and Catra’s still standing in the center off the room, chest heaving and on the verge of a panic attack. Melog appears suddenly, blazing red, and presses into Catra. Catra sobs once, gasping and then grabs tightly onto Melog’s mane which is surprisingly corporeal.

“S-shit,” she says.

She doesn’t understand why talking to _Mermista_ made her so unstable. Made her feel so _raw_. Why is she breaking down now when she managed to keep it together for all those talks with Adora?

Melog mews softly and presses harder into Catra’s side.

“I can’t. . . I have to stop for the day.”

Melog agrees with her.

Catra shakily pulls out her communication device and calls Glimmer.

It takes a few moments.

_“Catra? Everything alright? You’re a bit early.”_

“H-hey, Sparkles.”

“ _. . . Alright, I’ll be right over. What happened?”_

“Had a run in with Princess Mermista.”

“ _. . . Where are you?”_

“Same place you dropped me off.”

Glimmer’s telling chime-like magic sounds next to her almost immediately. Catra turns to see Glimmer reaching out for her. Catra doesn’t say anything just nods, takes her hand, and allows herself to be teleported away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shorter than I think it should have been. The conversation could be drawn out a bit longer to make it more realistic but ehhhhh, Catra's suffered enough. Keep in mind, that because of Adora's illness, Catra's been focusing more on Adora than herself. She hasn't really been talking to anybody (other than Melog, who quite frankly has been alone for a potentially scary amount of time and probably has issues of their own) about her issues and this proves to be a problem because even though she's helping with the recovery efforts, she's not tackling the real issues and the problem is just quite frankly getting worse because Catra has now diminished her self worth. 
> 
> In the show, Catra is shown as being confident and strong even in the face of extreme stress and emotional pain. (To some degree. You know what I mean). She has breakdowns but they're quickly covered by a mask. So why do I depict her as being quiet, almost timid like, and increasingly unstable? Catra can't approach her problems with the same mask she used in the Horde. Not without risk of loosing control and hurting somebody else again. So she's floundering because she's only ever tackled her problems with aggression in the Horde and she can't do that anymore. Her experience with kindness is limited and she doesn't know how to react to it. Her instinct reaction (aggression) cost her Scorpia. In the show, Catra becomes a lot calmer and timid whenever she's working up the strength to apologize. Right now, this phase of her life is like one big apology as she works towards restoring Salineas and helping the people she's hurt. Everyday, she's reminded of her mistakes and for the most part she's alone (aside from Melog) because her mental health prevents her from interacting with people she's hurt because she's afraid. That really wears down on a person's mental health. It's no wonder that she doesn't have the strength to keep up her masks anymore.
> 
> Did Mermista approach Catra correctly? Probably not. I actually have no idea because I have zero experience with therapy and mental health. Mermista needed answers, she needed to see Catra's change for herself, because otherwise, they were never going to get along. Pushing, however, wasn't the best idea. But Mermista is also observant and smart and despite being angry at Catra for her involvement with the destruction of Salineas, she also understands (partially because of Adora and partially because of her own observations) that the Horde was a shit place to grow up and she can't put all the blame on Catra for her actions. The princesses in general are very forgiving, but this was a direct attack on Mermista's own kingdom, she's not going to forgive that easily. 
> 
> Please let me know if you disagree with anything I've stated above. These are my own thoughts and I understand I am not the most knowledgeable about mental health.


	9. Razz Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora and Catra go to Razz for answers.

Adora is both excited and concerned that Catra decides to stay in Brightmoon the next day. Excited, because she gets to spend more time with Catra; they’ve been so busy the last few weeks that Adora feels like they’ve hardly seen each other at all, despite having rectified their differences and made up for past mistakes.

Concerned because of Catra’s mental condition yesterday. Because she _knows_ she didn’t get the full story yesterday and she _knows_ there’s something else going on that Catra is afraid of. All Catra seemed to want to tell her is that she ran into Mermista who Catra apologized to but the whole process left Catra feeling raw and uneasy.

Patience has never exactly been Adora’s forte but she’ll wait for Catra to tell her unless if proves to be more detrimental for both of them. Besides, she’d had an odd week herself after discovering that she could _hear magic_ , which later she found out wasn’t just limited to people. She could hear magic in _objects_ as well if they had enough of it.

It’s a trying time for both of them.

Adora knows that Catra isn’t feeling up to much social stimulation today. She knew that the night before really. So she decides to convince Catra to just _not_ stay in Brightmoon for the day. Staying in Brightmoon meant that Bow, Glimmer, and Micah would check up on them (rather frequently too because they would be concerned about Catra) and she _knows_ that doing so would bother Catra immensely, so she decides to visit Razz and drag Catra along with her.

Which reminds her that she doesn’t actually think that Catra has even _met_ Razz.

She starts thinking of ways to convince Catra to come with her when she wakes up. She always wakes before Catra unless Catra has some sort of commitment to be up, so she has at least thirty minutes before the cat hybrid starts stirring. Usually she gets up immediately, but she doesn’t this time.

The previous month being confined to bed rest has really upped her tolerance for staying still for long periods of time and she really hates it.

She’s about halfway through her fourth reasoning when Catra blearily opens her eyes to a contemplative Adora.

Catra groans. “Stop thinking. You’re going to hurt yourself,” Catra whines and buries her face into her pillow. Adora snorts.

“I can hurt myself by moving around too much apparently,” Adora responds and grins when she hears Catra’s tired chuckle.

Adora waits.

“Wad yu doin t’day?” Catra’s voice is mumbled and slurred into the pillow.

“I need to visit Razz. Talk to her about the whole hearing magic thing.”

Catra turns her head to stare at Adora. “You haven’t done that yet?”

Adora blushes in quick embarrassment. “No,” she whines pitifully. “I got a bit distracted, okay?”

Catra chuckles and reaches to grab Adora’s hand, tracing over the scars left by the heart.

“I’m worried that being She-Ra has messed with you,” Catra admits quietly. “Not _you_ as in your personality but physically. Between the Heart and the heaviness and now this? I’m worried.”

Adora turns onto her side to look at Catra easier.

“It scares me a bit too,” Adora replies honestly. “But you _know_ I’ve always been a bit strange. A bit stronger, a bit faster than what I should be. And maybe that’s just because I’m a First One but it’s also possible that it’s because I’ve _always been_ She-Ra.”

Catra frowns at that but she knows Adora is right.

“Is this hearing thing the last of it?” Catra asks.

“That’s why I need to talk to Razz. I don’t know. Most records of She-Ra only ever talk about her _healing_ capabilities, never this.”

“Will Razz give you a straight answer?” Catra asks cause she’s heard the stories. And seen the wreckage left of their room after Razz blew through.

“I hope so.”

Catra hums, still drowsy and barely awake. “I suppose I should help Sparkles today.”

“Um, actually I was hoping you could come with me?”

Catra blinks at her. “What do you need me for?”

“You think more clearly than I can. You can ask the questions I can’t.”

Catra hums and contemplates. It's honestly, more appealing than spending the day with Glimmer and potentially dealing with people and princesses. Spending the day with Adora sounds _extremely_ appealing.

Mermista’s words echo in the back of her mind and she _knows_ she needs to talk to Adora and Glimmer about that but she’d like to put it off a little bit longer.

“Okay,” Catra finally concedes and Adora grins, relieved because that took way less effort than what she thought.

Even after deciding on what they are doing for the day, they still don’t get up immediately. Adora is content to allow Catra to get as much sleep as she can because she knows the cat hybrid struggles with nightmares and unfortunately Adora due to her illness hasn’t been able to wake up to help her with them.

She wonders when her own nightmares will start.

After a while though, Catra heaves herself out of bed, groaning, and the day starts. They change and head to the cafeteria to eat. Catra is done before Adora and throws together a couple of quick lunches and puts them in a bag she’d stolen from Glimmer’s office. (She knows for a fact that Glimmer knows she took it because she had it on her two days ago and looked Glimmer straight in the eyes when she picked it up. The Queen of Brightmoon simply just rolled her eyes with a small smile so Catra figured she wasn’t _that_ mad.)

By the time she gets done, Adora has managed to satisfy her glutton of a stomach and they leave.

Adora gets increasingly anxious the closer they get to the Whispering Woods. By the time they reach the forest’s edge, Adora is glancing around nervously but also in awe.

Catra stops and raises an eyebrow at her.

“It’s louder here,” Adora says simply. “But it’s also kind of beautiful? Sort of like singing.”

Catra nods and tries to not let Adora’s words affect her so much. Adora’s already freaked out about this whole thing and Catra knows it's never good when _both_ of them are frightened.

It’s the first time either one of them has been in the forest since the end of the war. Both of them take a moment to look around in awe as they walk through because while magic has always been prevalent in the Whispering Woods, there’s never been _this_ much. The trees and plant life almost seem to move out of their way as they travel through the forest, guiding them on an almost direct path to Razz’s hut. Catra tucks her ears and tries not to think about it too much because even though she _knows_ the trees move (they always have), she’s never seen them so blatantly obvious about it.

She doesn’t see any wildlife, which is actually kind of strange because she knows the population of animals has gone _way_ up, but she’s not going to complain.

By the time they make it to Razz’s hut, Adora is _immensely_ glad Catra came along with her because she would _not_ have been happy making the trek through the already unsettling woods that are now _singing_.

She knocks on the door frame to Razz’s hut and smiles warmly when the frazzled old lady comes whirling out of the hut in a burst of energy.

“Adora dearie, you’re here!” Razz exclaims as she grabs Adora’s face between her hands and grins at her happily. Adora’s brain halts to a stop because the Razz sounds almost _exactly_ like the forest. Razz notices Catra almost immediately after. “And I was _wondering_ when you’d show up! Come in, come in! I have pie!”

As quickly as she comes, she’s gone back into the house and Adora can only really stare after her stunned because she was _not_ expecting her to sound so strange. But really, knowing Razz, she should have.

Catra nudges her into action and Adora steps forward and pushes aside the cloth over the opening to Razz’s hut.

Adora has to stifle a laugh at the sight of Razz purposely knocking things from shelves and onto the floor in messy piles.

Razz turns to both of them, excited, and grabs their hands before pulling them further into the hut.

“I’m so glad your both here. It’s so nice to see that you finally have each other,” she whacks Catra on top of the head with her broom, and Catra yelps. “I was worried about _you_. You really pulled it close there in the end.”

As Razz bustles away, Catra leans towards Adora, rubbing the top of her head.

“What did you tell her about me?” she asks a bit indignant.

“I don’t think I told her much of anything. I might have whined a couple of times about you though,” Adora replies. Catra scowls a bit at her but concedes that it was probably very much deserved.

Razz rushes back over to pull them to the table, placing a slice of steaming pie in front of each of them. Both Adora and Catra hesitate at the sight.

“She wouldn’t poison us, would she?” Catra leans over to mutter in Adora’s ear. Adora shakes her head.

“I don’t think so. At least, not on purpose,” Adora reassures.

“Both of you quit your fussing. The pie’s not poisoned,” Razz admonishes and both of them flush in embarrassment. The old woman gestures with her hands at the pie. “Eat! I’ll be back very soon with some tea.” She rushes away again, this time leaving the house entirely. Catra and Adora both turn to watch her leave before almost simultaneously looking back at their pie.

“Why do I feel so scolded by a woman older than dirt?” Catra grumbles. Adora shrugs.

“I’ve been asking myself that ever since I met her. I think it’s just a Razz thing.”

Catra hums and leans forward to take a tentative bite. Immediately her ears perk, biting back a pleased moan.

She’s not sure that she’s tasted anything like it before. It’s warm and sweet and easily _the best thing ever_. She tries very hard not to scarf the rest of it down, wanting to savor as much of the taste as she can.

Adora watches her a bit amused as she takes her own bite, pleasantly surprised as well at the taste, but she’s been living with Glimmer for years now and been exposed to all sorts of sweets so the taste isn’t as shocking.

“So?” Adora asks, watching Catra’s ears twitch with an amused grin.

“This is _literally_ the _best_ thing I’ve ever tasted,” Catra stresses. “ _Moons help me._ ”

Adora lets out a small laugh. Razz comes back inside at that moment, pausing to slide two more slices of pie onto Catra’s plate before rushing over to the stove.

“You need to eat more, dearie, you’re very thin,” is Razz’s only excuse. Catra doesn’t know whether to be mortified or grateful.

Adora tries very hard to hold in her laughter but she’s not really succeeding. Catra would scowl at her but that means that’s she’d have to pause in eating this absolute deliciousness and that seems like an absolute _crime_ to her.

“If you eat all of that, you are _going_ to get sick,” Adora warns.

“Worth it,” Catra says as she shoves another forkful into her mouth. Adora doesn’t bother hiding her laugh this time.

Razz carefully sets down two cups of steaming tea in front of the former Horde soldiers before settling down across from them with her own cup.

“Give it a moment to steep more dearies. It’s a bit hot yet and the water hasn’t had enough time to absorb the flavor.”

Catra pauses from eating for a moment to sniff curiously at the drink. It smells strange but similar to things she’s seen people in Brightmoon drink.

The three of them sit in silence for a short while before Razz speaks up.

“Adora dearie, you don’t usually show up unless you want answers for something,” Razz states and Adora winces because it’s _true_.

She really doesn’t visit unless she needs something.

“Sorry, Razz, I just-,” Adora starts but Razz waves her off.

“Not to worry, dearie, it’s what I’m here for.”

“Um, right. So I’ve been hearing this noise and it’s usually only prevalent around people who use magic? And usually, if it's just a sorcerer or sorceress it’s the same kind of noise but the princesses vary and I think I can hear magic?” Adora rambles a bit trying to explain. Razz’s expression doesn’t change, she just watches Adora for a bit before sighing.

“I wondered if this might happen,” Razz mutters to herself quietly. Both Adora and Catra look at her confused and partially alarmed. “What you’re hearing, dearie, is the Voice of Etheria and yes, it is magic.”

Both Catra and Adora stare at Razz blankly.

“How does a _planet_ have a _voice_?” Catra asks. Razz shakes her head.

“Etheria is our source, why wouldn’t it?” Razz answers unhelpfully. Adora’s brow furrows.

“Could you, maybe try an explain that another way? I don’t understand,” Adora asks. Razz hums contemplatively.

“As you probably know by now, the planet is the source of magic. Once you’re outside of the planet’s reach, you can typically no longer use the planet’s magic, unless, of course, you’re She-Ra. Different planets have different magic.”

“And how do you know this?” Catra asks because while it makes sense from what they’ve experienced, as far as she knew, _Razz never left the planet_.

Razz blinks at her. “The Voice, dearie. Do keep up.”

The former Horde soldiers stare at her blankly again.

“But Etheria is special. Its magic is more concentrated, reaches farther, connects _more_. All that concentrated raw magic power _changes_ things. In this case, it allowed for the development of a _subconscious_ of magic.” Razz sips her tea and does not say anymore.

“Um, what?” Adora asks.

“Are you . . .?” Catra pauses, brow furrowed in concentration. Adora glances at her. “Are you trying to say the planet itself is _alive?_ ”

“In a way, yes. But it is not alive in a sense like you and me. It is _there_ but it cannot be fully understood, let alone even _heard._ ”

“But . . . Adora can hear it,” Catra says.

“Yes, She-Ra has always been able to hear **Them**. As can I, but my hearing is . . . selective. I only hear what **They** want me to hear. Nothing more. But whether or not She-Ra can _understand_ is not guaranteed.”

Adora frowned thoughtfully as Razz talked.

“How do I know what Etheria is saying? I don’t . . . It’s just a bunch of humming,” Adora comments. Razz shakes her head.

“That, I cannot help you with, dearie. Etheria does not communicate with words and its language to you will be different than my own. My mind was muddled a long time ago by Etheria’s magic and I can only hear **Them** while I’m in these woods. My best advice is just to come to these woods, open your eyes, and just _listen_.”

“Does she have to?” Catra asks quietly. Adora’s head whips around to stare at Catra, eyes wide. Because she didn’t even think to ask, she just _assumed_ that it was her job to figure this out.

Razz shakes her head. “No, Etheria will _always_ be there to listen to guide, but Adora has already done so much.” She looks directly at Adora. “You can hang up the sword, dearie. You don’t _have_ to keep carrying that weight.”

Adora blinks at her. “What’ll happen if I do?”

“Nothing,” Razz replies.

“What do you mean?” Catra almost demands.

Razz sighs. “I do not know if there is a way to stop being She-Ra entirely. That kind of question can only be answered by Etheria itself. But you are not obligated to be _active_. She-Ra can rest for the rest of your days, Adora.”

“Is She-Ra only meant to be a weapon then? Only brought out in times of war?” Adora asks, almost distraught, and Razz looks at her in alarm.

“ _No_ , dearie. Perhaps I didn’t word that well. Yes, She-Ra is a defender of Etheria, but so are the princesses. She-Ra’s true job is to be a mediator between magic and mankind. Between Etheria, and those that walk its earth. But just because you _are_ She-Ra doesn’t mean that you have to devote your life to _being_ She-Ra. But you can choose to be whatever you want, Adora. Do not feel obligated to walk the path you _think_ She-Ra has laid out for you.”

“But with magic being brought back, we need a mediator. I mean, Glimmer’s been talking about all the weird things that have been happening and-”

Razz interrupts. “Do we? Or will we just be better off with one?” she asks. Adora’s mouth shuts with a click. “Adora, your greatest task is done. Us Etherians are smart and adaptable, we have to be to get through a war. We can make it without you mediating.”

Adora nods, quiet. And Catra looks at her, the last slice of her pie almost forgotten. She was glad that Razz has insisted on She-Ra being a choice. She didn’t want to see Adora lose herself to She-Ra.

“Will there be any other changes?” Catra asked quietly. Razz presses a hand to her forehead and hums in thought.

“I do not know. I cannot remember. I _know_ I was there for the She-Ra before Mara, but I do not _remember_.”

“Shit, how old is this woman?” Catra mutters under her breath, just barely loud enough for Adora to hear.

“It’s okay Razz. Don’t strain yourself,” Adora states, and Razz shakes her head.

“I’m sorry, dearies. There is much I do not remember from before and you and Mara dearie have always been _different_. You weren’t exactly chosen by normal means.”

Adora nods. “I know, the First Ones forced She-Ra to emerge in a First One with the sword.”

Catra glances at Adora in shock. “Really? So you’re a First One?” Catra asks.

Adora nods. “I didn’t tell you?”

“No. I guess it didn’t come up.”

Razz shakes her head in thought. “There’s a little bit more to it than that. The sword _restricted_ Etheria’s connection. Mara didn’t have a proper connection. Neither did you until you’d bested Prime and restored the planet,” Razz continues. Adora nods.

“That. . . actually makes sense,” she agrees. For a moment, all three of them were quiet, Adora and Catra contemplating everything that Razz said.

“Razz,” Adora started. “In the heart, I . . . saw a vision. Or well . . . I talked to Mara. Is that possible?”

Razz nods. “Very. Death is not always a barrier, especially for She-Ra. But I’m sure you already know that.”

Catra and Adora share a glance.

“Yeah,” Adora agrees and tries to push the memory of Catra’s unbreathing form from her mind. Catra shoves the last of the pie in her mouth, hoping the addicting sweetness drowns out the dark memories in her head.

Razz smiles warmly and stands, covering the remainder of the pie and placing it in a basket. She hands it to Catra.

“For when you get home, dearie,” Razz offers. Catra blinks.

“Wait, you don’t have to-,” she starts and Razz shakes her head.

“I insist.”

Catra nods and takes the basket.

Adora sighs and rests her head on her hands. Catra glances at her in concern.

“You alright?” Catra asks.

“Yeah, I just. I think I’ve learned enough for today. I don’t need to figure out all the answers right now. There’s no rush, right?” Adora asks.

“No rush. We can go home,” Catra reassures. And Adora starts at the thought. _Home_. She doesn't have to go off and fight the next battle. All the sudden, she just wants to go home and see her friends and smile and hug them and just set aside responsibilities for the moment because she _can_ and nothing bad will happen. She grins and grows in excitement. Catra studies her for a moment before sighing. 

“Thank you, Razz, for the answers,” Adora glances over at their empty plates and with some small amusement, continues. “And the pie.”

Catra nods. “It was good. Really good, actually. Thank you.”

“No problem, dearies. Come back anytime. I’ll do my best to answer any questions and help you,” Razz replies. Adora stands and Catra soon follows.

“Sorry for this being mostly a business call. I’ll try to come back sometime just to visit,” Adora states. Razz shakes her head.

“Don’t worry about me, dearie. I have Loo-kee,” Razz declares. Catra and Adora share a glance.

They exchange goodbyes as they leave but before Adora and Catra start heading back through the trees, they hear Razz call out to them.

“Oh! I forgot to say! I’m proud of you! Both of you!” Razz cries out and then bustles back into her hut.

Adora flushes and rubs at her eyes when they get heavy. Catra doesn’t say anything, just nudges Adora gently after several long moments have past and the action spurs Adora into motion.

“You alright?” Catra asks. Adora nods.

“Yeah, I just. . . it was good to hear that.”

“You did good. You literally saved the universe.”

Adora punches her shoulder.

“ _We_ saved the universe.”

* * *

_Some time later . . ._

Adora bursts into Glimmer's office, Catra sliding into the room smoothly behind her. 

"Glimmer!" Adora exclaims. Glimmer glances up at Adora.

"Adora! You're back! How did the talk with Razz go?" Glimmer asks. 

" _Great_. How busy are you?"

"Um, I can make time."

"Can we go to Mystacor and try the baths again now that I'm not super stressed about the war?"

Glimmer blinks because she was _not_ expecting that when Adora burst into her room.

"Yeah, but why. . . wait _now_?"

"Please?"

". . . Let me get Bow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOW DO YOU WRITE RAZZ? She comes off as too sensible. I tried, I tried SO HARD, but I really just ended up writing logical sentences and just getting rid of certain pieces to make it a bit confusing. I still don't think Razz's dialogue is Razz though. 
> 
> I don't know why but this chapter was a BEAST to write. My brain literally died like twice while writing this and I don't know if it was because of midterms or if this chapter is just THAT boring cause there's a lot of explanation and boring dialogue in this. Sooo, not the funnest chapter and not the most interesting but it was a road that needed to be crossed. 
> 
> That last bit with Glimmer was added as an afterthought. Just something to add more fluff to lighten up the seriousness that was this chapter.


	10. Rosette

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra finally reaches out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: I have never been to therapy and while I know people who have been, I never actually talked to them about it enough to know what really happens cause that's their business, not mine. In other words, this chapter could be entirely inaccurate. This entire thing is just one big speculation of what my tired, exam-ridden brain THINKS should happen. It's probably not accurate but I tried.

Catra stalks the hallways of Brightmoon’s castle with barely concealed agitation, Melog trailing behind her. She’d wanted to go to Salineas to do some mindless labor to take her mind off of everything but Mermista had _clearly_ put her foot down and now she had to go talk to _Glimmer_. Who she was sort of avoiding.

She sighs and pinches her nose. She didn’t want to have this sort of conversation with Glimmer but if she avoids it anymore, she’d only work herself into a anxious mess and she _couldn’t_ add something else to her list of issues.

She just needs to suck it up and get it over with. Rip the bandaid off so to speak. She’s been doing a lot of that lately and she’s not sure she’s doing any better when she feels so _raw_ and _fragile_ _all_ the time.

People say she is. But really, she feels just as roughed up on the insides as she did in the Horde. The pain though has been replaced with _guilt_. Which is somehow _worse_.

She pauses next to the door that she _knows_ leads to Glimmer’s office. Her sharp ears pick up on Glimmer’s grumbling from inside and she winces.

She was hoping Glimmer wasn’t going to be in her office today.

Steeling herself, she knocks carefully on the door. The grumbling pauses.

“Come in!” Glimmer’s voice sounds from within.

Catra opens the door after another deep breath and waits for Melog to slide in before shutting it behind her.

“Catra! Thank the _moons_! _Please_ tell me you have something to take me away from all this paperwork!” Glimmer cries out, dramatically laying her upper body on the piles of disorganized papers on her desk.

Catra shakes her head and swallows. “I ah, just wanted to talk to you about something.”

Glimmer blinks and takes in the way Catra has almost seemed to curl in on herself without moving an inch and relaxes back into her chair.

“Yeah, sure. What’s up?”

“Uh, Mermista said that she didn’t want me back in Salineas until I’ve done something, and that I needed to talk to you about it?” Catra rubbed her neck.

 _Oh no_. Glimmer can’t help but feel a spike of dread. She _knew_ that the confrontation between Mermista and Catra hadn’t exactly gone well, but she’d _hoped_ that Mermista would have given the cat hybrid a chance. She _really_ hoped Mermista hadn’t demanded something impossible or potentially disastrous to Catra’s health.

“What did she want you to do?” Glimmer asks carefully.

“She said I needed to reach out to somebody and talk to them? Said something about them being professional. Not sure what she meant but she said you knew.”

Oh. _Oh._ Glimmer could almost sag in relief because Mermista had started a process that Glimmer had been dancing around, too afraid to bring it up, ever since the war ended. She hadn’t wanted to upset Catra. Beyond just that, Mermista _was_ giving Catra a chance.

Still though, Mermista had left the hard part of the conversation to Glimmer.

Glimmer glances around quickly before getting up to pull a pile of papers off of the chair Bow usually used when he was visiting her.

“Sit down,” Glimmer advises and Catra obeys.

“So, there are people who specialize in listening to other people and helping them work through various issues. I have somebody that I talk to about what happened to my mom and the war. We also touch on my various insecurities and relationship issues and I have _no idea_ how Mermista knew I’ve been seeing a therapist but _honestly?_ It doesn’t shock me,” Glimmer explains.

“Therapist?” Catra asks.

“Yeah, that’s what they’re called.”

“And you just _talk_?”

“Pretty much. She’s been a _huge_ help.”

“Yeah, that’s fucking terrifying.”

“. . . The very fact that you said that only makes me think you need it more,” Glimmer replies, bluntly. Catra winces.

“What uh, what could she help me with?” Catra asks, reaching back to rub her neck again.

“All those bad, nasty feelings in your chest that make you feel anxious and afraid and hurt and completely unlike yourself? A therapist can help with that. And it doesn’t have to be the same one that I use. I _do_ think that Rosette might be a _really_ good fit for you but you can pick somebody else.”

Catra gulps. “I have a hard time even talking to _Melog_.”

“I’d imagine so. Catra, I’m gonna be blunt with you. Therapy has been really helpful for me, and I think you could benefit too. But it’s not going to _instantly_ be better. It’s a gradual thing. And a _lot_ of sessions leave me feeling very raw and emotional and usually I can’t do any kind of work afterwards.”

Catra was silent for several long moments before continuing. “How often do you go?”

“Once a week. It’s why you don’t really see me Monday nights. I try to schedule as late as I can.”

“You have to schedule? You can’t just show up?”

“A lot of people go, Catra. And the therapist needs to give enough time for them to really focus on talking through things. They’re usually forty-five minute sessions. Hence, the schedule.”

Catra nods and swallows.

“Think over the idea and let me know what you think later. I’ll talk to Rosette next time I’m in and ask her if she has an opening,” Glimmer recommends.

“No,” Catra starts. “No, I’ll uh. I’ll do it myself. Where?”

Glimmer studies her for a long moment. “Okay. How familiar are you with the city?”

Catra winces. She’s walked through it once but was ultimately overwhelmed and headed back to the castle. She hadn’t been out there since.

Glimmer sees the wince and sighs. “Let me know when you want to go and I’ll teleport you there,” Glimmer offers and Catra nods.

“I’d uh, appreciate that.”

“No problem.”

* * *

A week later Catra and Glimmer stand in front of a stone building that’s just as vaguely lilac as every other building in the city, _Brightmoon Counseling_ plastered rather simply on the front. Catra tries not to let her anxiety show too badly.

“You sure about this?” Glimmer asks. “Cuz it’s only really been a week. You can take more time to make up your mind.” She doesn’t want to convince Catra _not_ to go but she’s also worried that Catra’s forcing herself to do things that she might not be ready for.

“No, it's fine. This is just to set up an appointment, right?” Catra asks.

“Yep!”

“It’s fine. Mermista wants me to at least try before I can go back to Salineas and . . .” _the guilt is going to tear me apart if I don’t get back to work soon._ Catra doesn’t say the last bit out loud. Glimmer simply nods but internally knows that forcing somebody into therapy isn’t a good thing and she wishes Mermista hadn’t put her foot down so hard about it.

But she can’t really blame the water princess for doing so.

“All you need to do then, is go in talk to the secretary in the front room about setting up an appointment,” Glimmer says and Catra nods. “I’ll be out here when you’re done. We can get ice cream or something afterwards.”

“Thanks, Sparkles.”

“No problem, Horde scum.”

Idly, Catra wonders when those insults became terms of endearment as she shuffles into the building.

The inside is warm and homey and Catra has to blink because for whatever reason she was expecting tiled floors and sharp white walls similar to an infirmary. But the carpeted floor is warm and soft between her feet (a feeling that’s almost jarring because she almost never wears shoes and whenever she’s in a building she’s usually walking on something cold and hard), and there’s couches, not hard metal chairs. The gentle blue walls are covered in various photographs and there are more plants in one room than she’s _ever_ seen.

There’s also a table that holds a jug of water and a basket each for fruit and what appears to be cookies. There’s a machine of sorts next to the water that from the smell, appears to be holding coffee.

It looks like a home. Not a waiting room.

She walks up to the front desk and the secretary smiles at her.

“Good morning! How can I help you today?” the secretary smiles gently at her and Catra doesn’t know why but it helps her relax just a little bit more.

“I uh, was looking to set up an appointment?”

“Did you have someone in mind?”

“Sparkles said she saw . . . Rosette, I think?”Catra uses her nickname for Glimmer, partially because that’s pretty much the only way she refers to Glimmer anyways and partially because she’s not sure she wants the secretary to know that she’s involved with the Queen.

The secretary nods. “Rosette is one of our best. One moment, let me look at her schedule.” The secretary looks down at her desk to pull a calendar to the top and flip at the pages. “It looks like she has an opening later tonight at four and then one tomorrow at 1, Thursday at 9am and 4 again, and Friday at 10, 2, and 3. On Mondays, she’s available at 8 and 9.”

Catra’s ears almost flatten to her head. She panics for a moment over the decision because _she wasn’t expecting there to be availability so soon_.

“What, uh, would you recommend?”

The secretary blinks at her. “There’s no rush, darling. If you’re not comfortable scheduling for so soon we can schedule for several weeks out.”

Catra relaxes at that. “No. . .no I want to try. Let’s . . . let’s just schedule for tonight. I’ll. . . yeah. Four, right?”

The secretary nods. “I’ll put you down for four then. What’s your name?”

“. . . Catra,” Catra replies worriedly. She _really_ hopes her name doesn’t ruin her chances for this. The secretary doesn’t even blink, she just writes Catra’s name down on the schedule in neat handwriting.

“Alright Catra, I’ve put you down for 4 later tonight. If you want to change your appointment time or cancel, just come back and let me know.”

Catra nods. “Do I need to schedule like this each time I want to go in?”

“No, because you’re a first-time customer, I’d advise for you to have the first session with Rosette tonight and then decide whether you want to continue or change counselors. If you decide to continue, we can talk and potentially set up a recurring appointment.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

“It’s my pleasure.”

Catra exchanges goodbyes with the secretary and then leaves, anxious to get out. Glimmer is waiting excitedly outside.

“Soooo, how’d it go?” Glimmer asks. Catra shrugs.

“There was an opening at four tonight. I uh, went ahead and booked it. Do I owe these people money?” Catra asked. Glimmer shook her head.

“The first session is free, and I’ll pay for anything after.”

“Wait, you don’t have to-,” Catra starts, but Glimmer cuts her off.

“Don’t worry about it.” Glimmer waves. “Now, let's go get ice cream!”

Catra rolls her eyes but concedes. “Can we pick up some for Adora and just go back to the castle?”

“Of _course_.”

* * *

Four comes far too quickly. Adora was extremely supportive of Catra’s decision to go so soon and after finishing their ice cream, she spent the rest of the day until just before four trying to distract Catra from her anxiety. She was mostly successful.

Catra doesn’t know how to admit how warm and happy Adora’s efforts made her feel, even if the blonde did look like an _absolute dumbass_ for most of the day. It only got worse when Swiftwind stepped in to help and the amusing mild fumbling turned into barely restrained chaos.

She was there for it and she still doesn’t know how it happened but there is now a sword sticking from the ceiling of the throne room. Catra doesn’t know how she’s going to be in that room without looking up and laughing. Adora, on the other hand, is well and truly embarrassed about the situation. For all she is skilled with wielding the sword of protection, her skills don’t really extend to non-magical weapons other than a staff.

She doesn’t know _how_ they even got away with it. Unfortunately for Adora, though, she and Swiftwind were unable to fly up and pull the sword out before a guard came in.

But now it's nearly four in the afternoon and she’s standing in front of the same lilac building she stood before hours ago with more anxious dread than even when she faced off against the First One monster at the Heart.

Glimmer squeezes her shoulder supportively.

“You’ve got this, Catra,” Glimmer states. Catra nods.

“Yeah.” She steps inside. The same secretary from before smiles at her warmly and gestures to the couches.

“Go ahead and sit down and wait. Rosette will be out to greet you when she’s ready,” the secretary states and Catra nods, not quite trusting her voice at the moment.

The couches are just as comfortable as they look and she forces herself to relax slightly, easing into the softness. Melog presses their head into Catra’s side. They had discussed and decided it was best that Melog remains outside for her session. Catra’s not exactly happy about it because Melog is a comfort that’s she’s become almost _embarrassingly_ dependent on in the last month, but Melog is also a distraction and a bit of an excuse to hide behind. Catra knows Melog grows unstable the more Catra’s emotions run rampant. And Glimmer said that these sessions might be emotionally taxing and she doesn’t want to risk Melog getting defensive when her emotions run a little high.

Catra can’t truly talk about some of her issues if she’s trying to keep her emotions bottled up enough to keep Melog from getting stressed.

 _Proud of you_ , Melog mews, and Catra nods, grateful.

They sit in anxious silence for a few moments before a door opens and Catra hears somebody walk in her general direction.

“Catra?” a voice calls out and Catra turns. “My name is Rosette, it’s wonderful to meet you.” The counselor holds out her hand and Catra takes it, blinking a bit in surprise because Rosette looks _nothing_ like how Catra expected. She is short, _extremely_ short. And _round_.

She looks completely unthreatening.

“Nice to meet you too,” Catra manages out and Rosette smiles warmly.

“If you could follow me, we’ll have our session in one of the back rooms. Will your friend be joining us?” Rosette gestures to Melog and Catra shakes her head.

“No, they uh, respond to my emotions. We decided it probably wasn’t the best idea,” Catra explains, and Rosette nods.

“That’s perfectly alright. But they’re welcome to come for today if you want. Today’s just going to be getting some background on each other. I fully intend to keep it light.”

Catra shares a glance with Melog.

 _Up to you,_ Melog states. _But it may be better if you get used to doing this without me. I’ll be right here if you need me._

Catra turns back to Rosette. “No, it’s okay. They’ll just stay out here.”

Rosette nods. “Alright then. The backroom is right this way.” Rosette turns and walks over to the door next to the secretary’s desk. Catra gets up and follows after one last meow of encouragement from Melog. Rosette holds the door open for Catra when she gets there and guides her down a hallway with doors to other rooms before opening one near the end. Again, she holds open the door for Catra.

The room is a lot bigger than she thought, with two couches facing each other in the center and what appeared to be a closed-off changing room not far from it, off to the side.

Rosette catches Catra staring curiously at it and smiles.

“Some of my clients feel safer if they’re hiding while they talk,” she explains. Catra’s brow furrows.

“Doesn’t that make your job harder?” Because how does Rosette read visual cues if she can’t see them? Rosette shrugs.

“Yes, but I’d rather the client feel comfortable,” Rosette responds. “Go ahead and sit wherever you’d like.”

Catra chooses the couch because she’s not one to hide behind physical objects even if she does hide behind emotional masks. Rosette sits down across from her.

“Let’s start by introducing ourselves and then I’ll explain a bit on how this works. As I said before, my name is Rosette. I achieved a masters of Psychology at Brightmoon university. I have four siblings, one of which is a guard at the castle, and the other three run various shops around the city. I am married with two sons who drive me _absolutely_ bonkers and a husband who spends more time with his nose in a book than _me_ which is quite an accomplishment. My favorite pastime is baking which unfortunately has caused me to put on a few pounds over the years, but alas, I cannot bring myself to regret it.” She smiles again, at Catra. “You may share as much or as little about yourself as you’d like.”

Catra fumbles for a moment. “I’m not sure what to say.”

“Well, do you have any siblings?”

Catra shrugs. “I wouldn’t know. The Horde didn’t exactly keep a record of who came from where. I was told I came from a cardboard box and left in the Fright Zone.”

Rosette contemplates for a moment. “Any hobbies then?”

Again, Catra shrugs and gives her a critical look. “I don’t know. Do you _not_ recognize me?”

Rosette shrugs. “Who you were, who you are now, and who you _want_ to be are all very different things, don’t you think? Regardless, my job is to _help_. It doesn’t matter if you were Horde Prime himself, I would treat you the _exact_ same way I would treat anybody else. My job isn’t to judge you for your actions, it’s to help you.”

Catra tries to ignore the way her throat tightens at her words and nods.

Rosette continues. “Yes, I know who you are and I’ve heard a bit of what you’ve done. I know you were part of the Horde. But I’ve _also_ heard that you helped save the universe. That you’ve turned over a new leaf. That you’re _trying_ to be better. To me, that’s far more important than anything you might have done in the past. But again, we’re not here to determine the morality of any past actions.”

Catra nods again. “I don’t know what else to tell you that you shouldn’t already know.”

“And that’s completely fine,” Rosette reassures and then continues. “Whatever you tell me, whatever I learn, will _never_ leave this room. I will not tell _anybody_ about what happens within this room, I swear to you on that. The same stands for anybody else.”

“So you’re not going to give me any dirt on Spar-er- Glimmer?” Catra asks with a small smirk. Rosette shakes her head.

“Nope!”

Catra relaxes a bit at that. Because for all that Glimmer had been talking this therapy thing up, she’d failed to mention the fact that they wouldn’t repeat any information they’d learn.

That didn’t mean that Catra would trust Rosette right away. She’d let certain bits of information loose and see what happens after.

“Do you have any questions?” Rosette asks and Catra blinks.

“Is this really just _talking?_ I don’t really understand.”

Rosette laughs. “Yes, that is pretty much all that we will be doing. You’d be surprised how much talking can help.” Rosette studies for a moment and when she recognizes that Catra isn’t one to really initialize a conversation, she continues.

“So, what have you been up to lately?”

Catra shrugs. “Up until a week ago, I was helping rebuild Salineas. Since then, I’ve been hanging with Adora mostly, or bothering Sparkles, er, Glimmer.”

“I’m sure she enjoys that nickname.”

Catra smirks. “She _hates_ it, but I think she’s grown to tolerate it. Should probably come up with a new one soon to bother her with.”

“Do let me know her reaction. I know she’s very easy to rile up. You said you’ve been rebuilding Salineas? How’s that going?” Catra hides a wince and tries to keep the mask up.

“Well, we’ve gotten several buildings ready to be moved into,” she forces out.

“I’m impressed.”

Catra frowns. “What do you mean?”

Rosette hesitates briefly. “Part of my job is to read body language to understand when my patient is stressed. I don’t mean to freak you out, you do hide it well, but your race has always been particularly _expressive_. You showed some signs of anxiety when I mentioned Salineas. I find it impressive that despite the guilt and anxiety, you’ve engaged yourself in fixing a past mistake. That speaks _volumes_ about your character and your drive to improve, Catra.”

Catra nods but her brow furrows in confusion. “What do you mean ‘race’?”

“There are wood elves, sea elves, satyrs, reptilians, and hundreds of other different races on Etheria. Your particular race is a Magicat,” Rosette explains.

“Magic cat,” Catra deadpans and Rosette gives her a smile.

“Yes, your race is known for being skilled in all branches of magic, but especially so in that of shapeshifting, particularly into a giant cat of some sort.”

Catra blinks. “I . . . didn’t know that.”

Rosette nods solemnly. “Unfortunately, Halfmoon, the kingdom where your people resided was destroyed by the Horde years ago during the war, and they were believed to have been mostly killed off. Though you are not the only Magicat I’ve seen since.”

“Oh. I wasn’t abandoned then was I?”

Rosette sighs. “No, it was likely that you were taken by the Horde during the battle.”

Catra presses her face into her hands. “Every day, I think I grow to hate Shadow Weaver even more.”

“Shadow Weaver?” Rosette asked gently, hearing the pain in Catra’s voice at the sound of the woman’s name.

“She was . . . the person that raised me and Adora in the Horde, and also our superior officer.”

Rosette nods. “And why do you not like her? You don’t need to answer. I know I said I’d keep today light.”

“It’s fine. She was a bitch. What more needs to be said? She was awful to me and nicer to Adora but she was _still_ awful to Adora just in a different way. I just. . . I don’t understand why I _cared_ when she died, she . . .” Catra choked, jaw sliding closed with a snap.

_This stays between us. You wouldn’t want a repeat of today now would you?_

Catra closed her eyes, trying to calm her racing heart. Even after death, Shadow Weaver’s words still haunted her.

“Catra?”

Catra opened her eyes and refocused on reality. Rosette was watching her concerned.

“Sorry. I’m fine,” Catra reassured her.

“You don’t have to be. It’s okay to not be okay,” Rosette said. Catra shook her head and didn’t say anything more. Rosette sighed. “To answer your confusion, she _raised_ you. Of course you’re going to care. She was a significant part of your life.”

“She,” Catra started. “She wasn’t _good_.”

“And it’s a very good thing that you recognize that. But caring for somebody who can be seen as a bad person doesn’t also make you a bad person. There’s nothing wrong with that. Love is a confusing and very mysterious thing. We cannot always control who it latches onto. Shadow Weaver was important to you, in one way or another. There is nothing wrong with the fact that she _was_ important to you and there is nothing wrong with the fact that you are upset at her death.”

Catra nods.

“Do you want to continue talking about Shadow Weaver or should we move on?”

“Move on, please.” Catra hates the way she feels like a coward for trying to avoid the subject but she doesn’t particularly want to deal with that today.

“Of course.”

* * *

The end of the session leaves Catra feeling more uneasy than she’d expected. Rosette had somehow managed to touch on several other topics that Catra was sensitive about and Catra had shared far more than she’d originally intended. Rosette guides her to the door to the waiting room and then heads back to the room they’d been in. Catra opens the door to the waiting room and hesitates by the secretary and Melog bounds up to her, meowing.

“Would you like to schedule another appointment?” the secretary asks. Catra hesitates, before nodding.

“Yeah,” she says simply. The secretary smiles at that.

“Okay, does the same day and time work, or do you want to change that?” she asks.

“Same day and time are fine,” Catra responds as she strokes Melog’s mane. “And um . . . could I make it recurring?”

“Of course! Don’t worry about payment. I already discussed that with the Queen,” the secretary answers. Catra nods.

“Thank you.”

“No problem! I’ll see you next week!”

Catra nods and leaves, stepping outside and taking a deep breath of air.

 _How was it?_ Melog asks.

“It went fine. It got a bit . . . scary a couple of times. We touched on Shadow Weaver and Salineas and a few other things,” Catra answered.

 _You chose to come back,_ Melog observed.

“Yeah,” Catra responded and stared up at the clouds. “Rosette was nice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I've never been to therapy. All that you've read is just speculation. If anybody finds this to be too inaccurate or even insulting (god, I really hope not), please let me know and I will do my best to fix it.
> 
> I REALLY tried to make Rosette feel super warm and relaxing and unfortunately, I don't think I pulled it off. A: my experience with therapists is none and B: I don't actually know anybody I regularly interact with that is super friendly and warm without also being super awkward, something I didn't want Rosette to come off as. (Even though she sorta did) Covid probably didn't help with that. I myself, am super awkward which unfortunately leaks into my writing. This leads to "Sit in silence for a few moments" because my brain literally can't figure out how to continue the conversation. 
> 
> Also, I assume there some sort of university/educational system cause of "I'm a triple major" Adora. I just based it off of degrees and qualifications in the US. 
> 
> Also, also, I referenced "Nine" in this fic. "Nine" and "Champions" both exist in the same AU hence, being in the same series. It's not really super necessary for you to read "Nine" at the moment as long as you understand that I'm including the AU where Catra has multiple lives in this fic.
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed! I really appreciate any and all feedback that I get! Thank you!


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